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jagged

i'm feeling jagged-
all edges, sharpness;
i'm shattered, pointed.


there's nothing of softness-
no cushioned budoir

for my soul today;

not even a chair pad

for my mind's boney ass.

 

i want curves-

arcs, bends, roundness

to rest my cares in.

fluff would be nice-

little curliques of thought

or a colorful flowering of novelty.

 

Yet, there's nothing but hardness

bleakness and drudge;

miserable darkness,

ill humored sarcasm

to occupy my mood.

A contest entry

Never was there a comment that I could not love

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • Dalaney gold member
    March 12

    Edit | Reply

    I can honestly say I've felt this way many

    times.  You 'softened' the piece up with

    the third stanza, which relieves the reader

    of the deliberate heaviness, and then neatly

    fell back into the poem's main feel...very 

    well done.  I thank you for entering.

     

    Love, Lane