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A contest entry
- Thrill Ride: Lots of options, come join! by Pheo.
900 points, ended March 13, 8 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - POETRY PODCAST - Showcasing your work. by Thom Boulton.
700 points, ended April 1, 64 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Got an HM You Think Deserves Better? by Paloszoo.
900 points, ended April 9, 36 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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uh...
ok i guess i don't get how one word can make all these people like it so much...
how about... Strange... or apothetical....
why does this make sense to anyone... i just don't get it -
This really surprised me only one word a awsome word got you gold and green trophies. I am amazed look at you one word wins and that word means a lot.
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Thanks
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ok now this was disturbing just as you warned. i have to say though you impressed me with this one. I give you 3 points which now make you have a total of 6 points. thanks for entering kahy
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dude....either you've researched this or you're secretly harbouring serial killer tendencies LOL
Either way anther brilliant piece, I love the way you take us right in to their minds.
I also love that you write from their side.
I myself am quite obsessed with the workings of serial killer/mass murderers mind...Morbid as it may be.
Just Brilliant Thank You
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hungry is the word....what a meal...Thank you for entering our contest...novy & brazos
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A nice poem that you have written here.
-Nam
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this is a wonderful and grizzely write..absolutly beautiful..thank you so much for your time and entry and good luck in the contest..Sarah
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Another great killer poem. This is indeed another visually entertaining piece. Excellent write and good luck in my contest.
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This is well written, and much darker than I usually prefer. I have read through this three times though, so there is definitley something that just drew me into it. Nice job, and thanks so much for entering. Blessings, Patty
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Yummy. Grizzley, but funny, too.
Did you mean "solder"?
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Hi. Thanks for entering my contest and good luck! I’ve decided to use a slightly edited version of my friend Arkbear’s grading scoreboard to help me judge this contest. I hope he doesn’t mind. It’ll aid me in organizing my thoughts and judging fairly versus randomly. I hope you enjoy it and find it helpful. Writers with the highest possible points out of 80 will obviously win
Title Appeal: 9.85 – Awesome title. Very unique and alluring.
Poem Flow: 9.85 – Flow is great, though meter is off in just a few spots.
Depth: 10 – Imagery is phenomenal. Excellent choice of words. Perfect placement! I’ll remember this one for a long time.
Emotional Impact: 9.90 – Absolutely LOVED this!
Spelling and Grammar: 9.85 – Near perfect. You have an “its” that should be an “it’s”
Punctuation and Caps: 10 – YAY!
Presentation: 9.75 – Nice job!
Personal Appeal: 9.85 – Not my genre, but I did love this. Wonderful job!
My score: 79.05/80.00
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Purity in humanity
I so feel like this write could be seen as a light hearted expression of sentiment by one who sees no harm in carrying on within the confines of his own reality.
Perhaps it is different god that would guide such a soul for in a cannibal's sentiment eating your foe is akin to cleansing the earth of some seriously bad mojo.
I like it, I like it so!
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Sick and twisted I loved it. Nice write.
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Sick
i love these lines;
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Options galore, so many thoughts,
how to decide while your flesh rots.
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Made me think of death and murder, made me feel all fuzzy, lol. good read well worth the time. -
Aren't Canibals fun I really enjoyed reading this. It kinda made me giggle in places expecially the part about the bunnies. This was very creepy as well though. Thanks so much for entering
~*~NOTE: I added you to the finalist list -
now that I got some points thaought you would love some and good luck
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A very raw write but I like it thank you for entering the contest
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Thank you for your entry in the contest. A very visual and interesting, if dark read that was enjoyable, but we feel it is not as narrative as we would have liked.
All the best in the contests
Sue and Jeff
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Graphic and raw - the rhythm set it off. The expression was in your face as it should be. For Poetry this was GOTCHA!!! f*ckin deal with it. good luck
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i stopped in the middle of this because the poem is so long but its a good poem its just i have a short spand hate very long perms but you have style and creativity and i wish you good luck in piffy contest
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great dark and disturbing poem I really adored it I loved it I am glad you won the contest and I hope you win the last two. Keep up the good work cause this was fantastic.
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Totally awesome
This was a disturbing piece and I like that. Very well written and I think if we all look deep enough there is a little bit of the cannibal in us all. Love it immensely.
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i loved this piece. i guess theres someonew like this in us all buried under the rules and laws that we all sadly must live by
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Lol! When you told me to read this, I knew it sounded familiar!! I already read it AND left the comment about Ed Gein - inspiration for texas chainsaw massacre, psycho, and the silence of the lambs. Just read down a bit. I can't remember everything I said. Something bout his mother and graves lol
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Dark & Scarey
you are such a hungry creature......thank you for entering our contest....novy & brazos
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It's nice, but, I'm afraid, not really my cup of tea. I don't really like the rhymes (but that's probably me being stuck up). But the imagery is good and I like the form. Thank you for entering my contest
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Very good!<
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Quite appealing. If you happen to catch me I would like to be ground up and made into a meatloaf to be served at a political fundraiser; it doesn't matter which party, as almost everybody in politics is a greedy cannibal.
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Amazingly twisted. I could feel the filet cuts in each swallow..
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wow
I could hear "Hannibal Lecter" reciting this and just giggling to himself. Although some of the rhymes were a tad stretchy, it seemed to just make it that much funnier. Hard to say funny when you are talking about such a gruesome topic, but it was funny.
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hmmmmmm
an odd and wonderful ride, pass the Chianti
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"Eyeball as a pendant, a skin made ring,
they will make fine jewelry, the greatest bling."
--this made me giggle with sick amusement.
I love dark writing and this is no exception. The imagery is on point! Especially the line "Lifeless lump of rotten flesh, what shall I create?" It flows beautifully.
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Well...Hmmmm...I don't quite know what to say about a write like this. You have definitley put yourself in the moment here. Your words are gruesome for sure. At first I wonder what place poetry like this really has in literature, but then again, freedom of expression and to explore ideas should always be allowed to exist. Like you mention in your AN's...this scenario exists as entertainment in movies so why not poetry? There is place for everything I guess and you have managed to pen in this sadistic vein very well...alby
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Silence of the lambs, texas chainsaw massacre, psycho, all thanks to Ed Gein. The mentally ill grave-robber who loved his mother...eh a little too much?
This was extremely entertaining,
and very well written.
Some parts threw me off just a little bit, but then the following lines picked me up again. Well done, and thanks for sharing. -
Come on now! I know you're really a Vegan!
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Wonderfull
Over all i loved the poem!! There was a few lines the wording kinda made you stumble during the reading...
Scrawled notes from my favorite paper back book,
remind me how a human brain I should cook.----I like the idea of this like, its the "How a human brain I should cook." --- It matches with your rhyme scheme great but dosent have that flowing sence like the rest of your poem.
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Options galore, so many thoughts,
how to decide while your flesh rots.------ The "While your flesh rots." Is a bit corney... maybe you can freshen it up....
The poem is wonderfull never the less.... My favorite lines are....
A bell sounds signifying dusk, time to eat.
I think I shall start with one of your feet.
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Lifeless lump of rotten flesh, what shall I create?
A memento of sorts that is very ornate.
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GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!
----Alie----
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A fun, dark read! I would have preferred a poem of 50 lines or less (stated in the rules), and there are also a couple of grammatical/mechanical/spelling areas needing attention.
Imagery overall is excellent. A few things stuck out just a little--"bling," for example, just didn't feel like it fit with the rest of the clever descriptions.
Favorite lines (although one contains a spelling error!): "Such a gruesome canvas of grizzly gore./
An inkwell of blood seaps from every pore." I love your use of assonance and the continued theme of art created through murder. You have adeptly painted a picture (so to speak!) of a madman who truly believes he is creating in the ending of another person, and revels in it. Very, very well done!
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This was truly fun to read!
it sounded like you had fun writing it, too!
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wow, as long as you promise not to kill me and eat me, I would like to have you in my family
What would you like to be?
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Thanks a lot for the creepy entry! lol
We appreciate it and wish you all the best
with it in our contest. Good luck!
Jeremy0826 -
Wow! Crazy stuff here. Thanks for another great share! (DO you think Ed liked BBQ'd hand or with ranch?) JK! Awesome piece!
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great flow and imagery!!!! sick and twisted just like mr lector himself great write!!! Murder, madness, mayhem, mutilations,
OOh how they give me the best sensations awesome lines!!!!
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