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Sweet The Voice

 

 

 

 

I walk the lonely streets of hopeless dreams,
Where love has closed my bitter destiny,
The dwellings echo children's frightened screams,
Yet sweet the voice that sings of liberty.

Each brick that tells of greed and hatred's rage,
Possessions reasons for reality,
When life is less than wealth, a darkened age,
Yet sweet the voice that sings of liberty.

To hurt a brother, steal, then kill or maim,
A destined place of cruel insanity,
The tears of mother's hearts, the spoils of fame,
Yet sweet the voice that sings of liberty.

I walk the lonely streets of hopeless dreams,
Yet sweet the voice that sings of liberty.

 
 
JF 10 March 2009

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Comments

1 - 24 of 24

  • Laughing at you
    October 4

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    well what can a scouser living in your great country say....a wonderful intense poem at a political philosophical existential and personal level....great stuff....ok enough grovelling for today..back to the hopeless dreams....keep well


  • prain82
    September 1

    Edit | Reply

    awesome feel !!

    it reminds me of green day's boulevard of broken dreams song, when I read it aloud and then I read it once more to paint the picture in my mind and a third time to let it sink in becasue I loved it so well.. awesome !!


  • sinfull
    August 30

    Edit | Reply

    Love this form

    Have not read an echo sonnet before...am going to try one! Swet flow here..very nice write. I love this line "When life is less than wealth" so poetic. Strong message in a well-written sonnet. Very nice!


  • Pattiboo silver member
    August 13

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    reflects life for so many today

    two things came to mind Martin Luther King and I Have a Dream
    and the protest song We Shall Overcome

    Not in his case a hopeless dream and certainly a sweet voice singing of liberty


    A beautiful thought provoking poem thanks for the read


  • Pattiboo silver member
    August 13
    Edit | Reply

    reflects life for so many today

    two things came to mind Martin Luther King and I Have a Dream
    and the protest song We Shall Overcome

    Not in his case a hopeless dream and certainly a sweet voice singing of liberty


    A beautiful thought provoking poem thanks for the read


  • Ellis gold member
    August 5
    Edit | Reply

    Very effective

    The mixed result of Mankind's Liberty...

  • A beautiful sonnet, full of philosophic, human imagery, the political repeat is very powerful.
    Liked this poem a lot.


  • Amera gold member
    May 13

    Edit | Reply
    Oh this is beautiful! I love how you took the Kyrielle Sonnet and changed the traditionally eight syllable lines to decasyllable. I think it actually gives the poem more substance.

    Love,
    Amera♥

    • Thank you Amera.

      This is probably the first sonnet I felt safe enough to let me come out and drift from the dictated form.


  • Sue Cardwell gold member
    March 24

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful Sis and I love the 'catch' line. You have captured so many emotions with this and it has to be one of your best.

    Love
    Sue

  • Just stunning! Amazing imagery and deep thoughts in this piece. One of the best thought provoking poems I have read in a very long time.
    'Yet sweet the voice that sings of liberty' Love that line of hope you have woven through this.
    Gaylene

  • THIS POEM HAS A REALLY NICE FEEL TO IT, VERY UNUUAL METER, I LIKE IT VERY MUCH IT FEELS FRESH ON THE TOUNGUE


  • Reanna Eryn
    March 20
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful ryhme. Lovely poem.


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    March 15
    Edit | Reply
    This is pretty good, Jem.


  • A.E.Blackwell
    March 14

    Edit | Reply
    IMO, if you are going to rhyme, the poem has to have meter...but this is good never the less and has a great message...very sad, very sweet...lets hope liberty sings forever!

    • Thank you.

      I believe liberty sings in most living things when she/he is needed. Just one has to listen.


  • cricketjeff gold member
    March 10

    Edit | Reply
    If it were 8 syllables to a line this would be a lovely Kyrieele sonnet, but as it is it has to be a lovely 10 syllable kyrielle sonnet, the repeats do not appear forced or over-bearing as they so often do in this sort of poetry and the whole hangs together very well

    Great stuff


    Jeff


  • albymyheart gold member
    March 10

    Edit | Reply
    I love this form, (whatever it may be). The repeat lines work so well and seal the ending beautifully. Sad thoughts on life and society here, but you cleverly use the repeating line to reinforce a thought of hope. Excellent!...alby


  • Swangrnv gold member
    March 10

    Edit | Reply

    well i don't know..

    what kind of sonnet this per form, but i do know it is one and a great one in my opinion at that!! sad, but dripping stark realities throughout, an excellent write my wonderfully skilled friend..

1 - 24 of 24