The Dingleberry Machine

The Dingleberry Machine

It just wasn't the same, being back in Smallville without Tony.  I couldn't
stay away, my folks would be heartbroken, but it broke my heart to walk
those streets and not see The Dingleberry Machine cruising up sleek and
black beside me, and not hear that familiar BAA BAA BAA BOOM that Matt had
spent a whole weekend helping Tony to set up for the horn to play.  I think
my brother Matt was the only one who knew how Tony and I really felt about
each other.  The folks had not liked me seeing him, kind of a reverse
prejudice thing I guess, "He's the doctor's son; too good for the likes of
you.", but we had been in love since grade six and figured we always would
be.  In a stupid twist of fate I had ended up being the one to go off to
school, a good scholarship in the big city, while Tony had stayed in
Smallville to take care of his sick dad.

I hadn't made it back for the funeral.  No had thought to call me.  Mom
mentioned the accident in one of her infrequent phone calls, and it was the
middle of exams and only a week to Christmas by then.  So here I am with my
family, but so alone.  My dreams of a bright future had faded with that
call, the same call that had sparked them into a bright flame when I
learned only a few minutes earlier that Tony's dad had finally passed on
and he, being the only child had inherited everything.  Just for a brief
moment I had seen us standing side by side from that day forward.  Now, as
I walk down this snowy street I see no future at all.  So near. So far.
Almost a bride at Thanksgiving, same as a widow by Christmas.

BAA BAA BAA BOOM.  BAA BAA BAA BOOM.  I hadn't seen the oily blackness of
the '68 Mustang slide up on my left, but there it was, The Dingleberry
Machine, looking like it had just had hand wax job, and Tony, looking like
he needed what Tony always needed.  The dingle balls swayed in the breeze
as I climbed in and four hundred watts of ACDC pumped out the speakers.
Tony put his arm around me the way he always did and I snuggled in beside
him in that familiar old way that let him reach the shifter and didn't get
my knee caught in the steering wheel.

"Tony, they said..."

"People are always saying things.  I said I'd be here for you."

"But how?"

"I don't know Diller.  I just don't know.  I guess sometimes there's
business that just has to be finished.  This is one of those times.  I
don't have long.  I know that, so just listen.  I was driving up to see
you.  I'd just pulled onto the highway when the wheel off that truck came
through the glass at me.  It was going to be us forever."

Tony pulled off main and down behind the feed mill.  It used to be one of
our spots, and I thought for a sec that he was going to pull up in the
grove of trees by the river where we had spent so many happy hours, but he
just grinned that stupid lopsided grin of his as we passed and hit the horn
button.  "BAA BAA BAA BOOM, BAA BAA BAA BOOM" he sang along with it.  A
Fifth Of Beethoven was where it had come from, an old disco song he had
liked.  We drove over the tracks and out past the canning factory, closed
this time of year.

Tony signaled right and cut fast into Hotch's Wrecking Yard, the way he
always did.  He drove down the end aisle, the one where they put the cars
that don't have any usable parts on them, and parked at the end.

"End of the line Diller." he smiled that smile again, but there was a touch
of sadness in it too.  "Kiss old Tonums bye-bye."

I could feel his lips get colder as we kissed.  By the time we finished
there wasn't a trace of heat left in The Dingleberry Machine and although
it may have been just my tears, it seemed like Tony was fading from sight.
He spoke again.

"Look in the mickey hole.  It might have been scootched around a little
bit, but there's something in there for you."

"Tony, please, don't leave me alone."

"You're not alone Diller.  There's a piece of me growing inside you."

I thought about it.  Jesus, he was right.  What with exams and everything I
hadn't noticed, but I was late.  I hugged him again, but suddenly I felt I
had to get out of there.  I opened up the glove box and pulled down on the
top part.  There was an envelope in there, and of course a mickey of vodka.
By the time I got out of The Dingleberry Machine
the windshield was gone and the front of the roof was starting to peel
back.  I took one last look as I passed the office and there was just an
unrecognizable lump where it had been.  "baa baa baa boom" came tinnily
from inside it.

By the time I had crossed the tracks and gone up First Street to my
parent's house the mickey was empty, as empty as my arms.  There was a
wedding ring in that envelope, and a will, and a marriage licence.  Only
Matt knows how we managed to get that fixed up, but there's no one can ever
say Tony and I weren't legally married.

I practice in the same office that Tony's dad practiced in, and I sleep in
his old room.  Tony Junior sleeps in the next room.  I get a bit lonely at
times, but one day, 'way down the road, I know I'm going to hear that old,
"BAA BAA BAA BOOM, BAA BAA BAA BOOM', and climb into The Dingleberry
Machine for one last ride.