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{•M•U•S•E•}

You were supposed to be my   m u s e
    {}{ So why won't you i.n.s.p.i.r.e me, bitch? }{}

When did you

s

l

i

p

•

a

w

a

y

    ?into ♥l♥o♥v♥e♥ and h*a*p*p*i*n*e*s*s?

 

What ..:: r.i.g.h.t ::.. do you have to be happy?
When we're supposed to be the

p
u
•
d
e
k
c
u
f
  ones?


Will you -c-r-y- on his shoulder instead of |m|i|n|e| ?now?
      Will you •l•a•u•g•h• over ((nothing)) with him instead of |m|e| ?now?
           Will you ♪s♪i♪n♪g♪ out loud &&               without |m|e| ?now?
                                                        ♫offkey♫

I've never known you to be ¿h¿a¿p¿p¿y¿

So maybe he'll be the one to ..:: fix ::.. you










But baby, I never thought you were b.r.o.k.e.n

Author notes

Hmmm yes... this is the result of a conversation between Girl Mad as Birds and myself... about how neither of us really like dirtypretty all that much, and how there are NO happy dirtypretty poems. Then we were talking about how I had writers block because I'm happy (I don't do good at writing happy), and normally I'd write about her... but now she's happy too!! Then we decided I should write some dirtypretty about that. Go figure

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 27 of 27

  • Diminished Capacity gold member
    July 18

    Edit | Reply
    You're very good at the dirt pretty, something that I'm trying to learn myself. This one is absolutely awesome.


  • Heva Feva
    June 8

    Edit | Reply
    Haha cool! I really like this one. There are happy dirt prettys out there, you know. Good job, I can't do dirty pretty. Good luck and thanks for entering my contest.
    -heva


  • Iridessa MoonFlower
    May 31

    Edit | Reply
    I read this one before. I am not use to this style. I wish I could do something like it. Great work.
    ♥ ~~Shannon~~

    • DramaQueen469 gold member
      May 31
      Edit | Reply
      Thankyou for your comment; this is probably the only dirty pretty I'll ever write lol, and only because I was so intrigued by the style

      Maria


  • Stormy Sky
    May 26

    Edit | Reply
    I love it. Amazing. I like how you formatted it and the "will you" section. i also like how you ended it with "but baby i never thought you were broken." very beautiful. Good luck in the contest~!

  • xVamPirexMusiCx
    May 14
    Edit | Reply
    Absolutly amazing!


  • Antebellum
    May 13

    Edit | Reply
    this is nice.

    haha but there are happy dirty pretty's..not very good [because ive wrote some] but they exsist.


  • Menna
    May 13

    Edit | Reply
    Very nice as far as I could tell. It had a message that was unique, I loved the guy's perspective. Good emphasis on the words and nice formatting Thanks for entering my contest. It was a pleasure to read

    -Menna
    p.s. i like the upside down question marks, they're cool


  • KelsiEvermore
    May 7
    Edit | Reply
    You're in the finalists!

  • KelsiEvermore
    May 5

    Edit | Reply
    Nice job on this! Thanks for your entry, and good luck!

    I love this:
    When we're supposed to be the

    p

    u

    •

    d

    e

    k

    c

    u

    f

    ones?


  • XcPrincessB
    March 24

    Edit | Reply
    Very Very good poem. Certainly is Dirty Pretty. Not sure it needs or benefits from it tho.
    I did really lie teh way you wrote OFF KEY - that was perfect.
    I'd never know - if not for reading ur AN that this wasn't "felt" as raw emotion. U did well in conveying anger at ur lost muse and the final line was so sweet.
    Well done on a great write.


  • Kathraina silver member
    March 16

    Edit | Reply
    Aww the last line is very tender.
    I like the emotion pored into this piece, it really makes it strong.
    Bravo!


    • DramaQueen469 gold member
      March 16
      Edit | Reply
      Thankyou very much, and good luck judging the contest - there are so many great entries!!

      Maria


  • DecorusApparatus
    March 13

    Edit | Reply
    Margie does dirty pretty...
    Not too bad I have to say.
    I liked some lines more than others but I do think that you've got the hang of it.
    Keep it up, hope you're over ze writers block.

    --Katie ♥♥

    • DramaQueen469 gold member
      March 14
      Edit | Reply
      Thanking you!

      Yeah, I scared myself when I wrote it, it was partially an injoke between me and Skye (or Girl Mad As Birds, as she is here ) and... yeah.

      Maria


  • XXheartbroken3XX
    March 10

    Edit | Reply
    Wow cool poem...

    i know what you mean...

    How its not fair when the one who was always sad with you finally found happiness and you couldn't/haven't.

    i love it!

    ♥XoXo♥

  • Chris-Rice
    March 9

    Edit | Reply
    WOW! This a beautiful piece of work, you reveal your emotions wonderfully. I was surprised to see that this was your first piece of dirtypretty, you obviously have a natural talent for it.


  • Girl Mad As Birds
    March 9

    Edit | Reply
    Baby, you know I'd never
    L
    e
    a
    v
    e
    Y.O.U.

    l o v e y*o*u* W|A|Y

    T
    O
    O


    m.u.c.h

    &&

    • DramaQueen469 gold member
      March 9
      Edit | Reply
      Baby, if he makes you *h*a*p*p*y*
      I will be
      ((forever))
      in his
      d
      e
      b
      t





      && you know that's all I ever wanted...


  • A-Sky-Lark
    March 9
    Edit | Reply
    0.0 love it!
    last line is good, it's all good :]


  • xxRainbowDawnxx
    March 9

    Edit | Reply
    This describes me sooo well. I can feel the hurt and betrayal of someone turning away from you to be with someone else and feeling not adequate enough to help them, when you could've swore they only cared about you. Heartbreaking, but really real for me. I love it, keep writing you're great at DP!


    • DramaQueen469 gold member
      March 9
      Edit | Reply
      Aw thankyou so much, this is actually my first attempt at dp lol so I'm glad you liked it! Thanks!

      Maria

1 - 27 of 27