Tiny specks of something-
-something indecisive
Trickle down your brow
You leave me faithless again
When I thought we were alright
You tend to stomp on out
You're drifting away from me
The sky more vicious than the sea
You're running away, again
You don't live with me anymore
You've moved out on your own
Out into the storm
I wonder if I can fix you
Your rusting sides and hinges
So that you can come back to life
The little girl who once
Sat contently in my arms
A plethora of freckles
You're drifting away from me
The sky more vicious than the sea
You're running away, again
You don't live with me anymore
You've moved out on your own
Out into the storm
I miss my little girl
When was the last time I saw her?
For the life of me, I cannot remember
Oh, I plead, I pray
Please bring her back
Back into my safe arms once again
You're drifting away from me
The sky more vicious than the sea
You're running away, again
You don't live with me anymore
You've moved out on your own
Out into the storm
Author notes
I'm in no way looking to be a professional writer of any sort, but I am looking into transforming a lot of these into lyrics.
A contest entry
- Best Prewrites! by movedon.
1750 points, ended May 8, 363 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think, and do you have any suggestions on how to make it better?
Comments
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you moved out on your own, out in to the storm
that is one line i can relate to most from your entire poem. I can see this being a poem with no problem. Flows nicely, would make a nice beat. Thanks for taking the time to enter my contest, and I apologize for me delay in judging! Best of luck! -
Yes, an inspiring song, take your time with it, and it will continually flow. Wonderful job. Blessings.
-
well done
strong use of rhyme. this looks to be an excellant ballad. slow to moderate 4/4. i hope to hear/read more in the future.
all the best,
kevin o'connor/ui'connabhair
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