theres a dance inside a circle
where bitter smiles reside
and pushing out the boundaries
he's running off to hide
and she's always
... falling in his footsteps
when distant memories cry
but like a push me pull you journey
or a fisherman with lines
he casts to catch and win her
but plays on never minds
and after one too many
dutch courage makes demands
but when the dutch wears off
the eagle never lands
and so it's,
... just another flyby journey
where he won't second guess
a horse who's wearing blinkers
who should be more than less
and she's the silent thinker
at the table shes his chair
in a thousand unsung love songs
she's pies baked in despair
and they always stay ... unfinished
like schuberts number 8
a King and Queen of nowhere
like chips without the steak.
Author notes
Having another go at lyrics.
A contest entry
- Bittersweet by Emmyb.
730 points, ended March 22, 34 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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I have always seen the very close link between Schubert's Unfinished Symphony and chips. I think it's because Schubert was a fat git and fat gits love a face full of chips. I know I do, and I have written no symphonies and am only slightly fat. QED.
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Wicked
Really enjoyed this one B. I read it 3 times and loved it. Great Poem girl
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Very creative and well done
I enjoyed reading this
Thank you so much for sharing this and for being part of the contest
The best to you -
Wow, I love this
Bravo
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I think I like this poem; however I'm having trouble understanding it. Would you please explain for me?
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i do not know how this fits into my prompt it is early this morning. But this is a very fine and welll written poem
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great, i really like this part- and she's the silent thinker
at the table shes his chair
in a thousand unsung love songs
she's pies baked in despair.
nice metaphores and meaning, thanks for entering -
its really good
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i was definitely amused by the title of the poem before entering.
and she's the silent thinker
at the table shes his chair
I liked the imagery of this poem. You chose some interesting phrases and words/ideas to put together.
well done. great write. thanks for entering. -
I love it, everything about this poem! It's very well written. Keep writing!
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Thankyou
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AWSOME!
This was great! I loved your play on words and the imagery. The flow and rhymes were perfect as well. Thank you!
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Really kind comments.
Thankyou very much.
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Good to read you again, and I see you have lost nothing in the waiting time, lovely flow with a full course story as well.
Excellent
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Wow! thanks for such a lovely comment.
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Ahh wow, now this is true poetry. I just love this!
Best wishes in the contest.
Gaylene
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Thankyou very much.
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truly wonderful!! cant wait to read more of your work. thank you for sharing!
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A great comment.
Many thanks.
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Reminds me of that old saw, "He's all sizzle and no steak." Don't you hate it when that happens? Very well written.
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Hahaha
Yes indeed it does.
Thankyou for reading and your comments.
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Superb
'tis a very fine write, indeed. You have expressed your thoughts quite well. Thanks for sharing this one with us. -
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Thankyou.
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Well done! I like the rhyme scheme.
Good to see you back.
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Hi Mike.
Really Great comments from you.
Thankyou very much :-)
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