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Serena

Serena,Serena,....I am stupefied,
I am dulled and dumbed,
by the serenity
that surrounds you.

You stand there in still,
and one can see clearly,
your will,
pouring through the white,
that you wear,
Serena ..do you hear.

and consider...and seance hard,
that I stand just there,
very very near.

Author notes

that I stand just there,
very very near.

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    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • Sonja
    August 25

    Edit | Reply
    Nice and interesting poem this is with good flow, rhythm and rhyme. From only a few lines it is obvious that you would like your Serena to be much closer to you. The whole picture looks very transparent and ethereal .
    ~Sonja~


  • Sweet Impatience gold member
    March 10
    Edit | Reply
    I just noticed which prompt are you writing this poem for? please place the link in your AN.


  • Sweet Impatience gold member
    March 10
    Edit | Reply
    I think that you did a great job on the prompt.

    thank you for entering and good luck
    kat


  • Cannonsfire
    March 6
    Edit | Reply
    Wow very ethereal here, can feel the chill breeze C