..The Journey
Where should I wander? this warm summers day
A vagabond stream asked, ‘You heading my way’?
‘I’ll show you a river that’s just round the bend
at the foot of a mountain you’ll want to ascend’
I pondered a moment then made up my mind
to join in the journey to see what I’d find
It’s voice mesmerized me while tripping the stones
drawing me onward with whispering tones
On through the brambles, ignoring the pain
that ripped at my flesh as they tried to restrain
I entered a valley where cornflowers massed
and eagle eyed butterflies watched as I passed
An old weeping willow stood bowing its head
I swear the stream chuckled at something it said
At the bank of the river the little stream sighed
twas the end of its journey it's here that it died
A Kingfisher watched from its perch upon high
cloaked in its raiment that mimicked the sky
Once more I pushed on to the edge of the trees
where the sweet smell of pine wafted in on the breeze
It’s here that I paused looking up at the sky
I’d soon need to search for a place to keep dry
For rain clouds were gathering out to the west
which threatened to place a delay on my quest
…
Where should I wander? I pondered once more
as I kicked the pine needles that covered the floor
While wondering if the path where I stood
would be safe for a traveller to take through the wood
I gazed to the point where it faded from sight
lost in the shadows defusing the light
Making my mind up I stepped on the track
compelled to go forward inclined to turn back
Silence hung on me and senses were fired
As my feet set in motion the movement required
Tranquillity came as I entered the gloom
Mother Nature was calling me back to her womb
I watched a Roe Deer glide with consummate ease
And Red Squirrels race round the tops of the trees
A grumpy old Porcupine ambled along
While off in the distance a bird was in song
My ears soon attuned to the slightest of sound
Like the cries of a pine needle hitting the ground
With eyes now accustomed to woods dappled shade
I watched mesmerized as two Pine Martens played
Bright shafts of light seemed to beckon to me
Where the sun breached the gaps in the dense canopy
As I exit the woods to a different terrain
I am caught in a downpour of life giving rain
At the foot of the mountain I took a respite
Gazing in awe at its glorious sight
The stream had been right I would have to ascend
to the peak where the point of my journey would end
Cautiously moving I stepped on the shale
at the foot of the mountain began my assail
It seemed to my mind that the gods had conspired
to banish my quest for the goal I desired
The wind was demented and screamed in my ears
Numbing my senses while feeding my fears
With the rain more than willing to join in the fray
As they both did their damnedest to sweep me away
A stubbornness gripped me I would not be beat
What ever befell me, I would not retreat
My muscles were screaming while searching for grips
As I hung on that mountain by my finger tips
For what seemed like hours, I battled that slope
And I knew I could beat it so did not lose hope
The peak was before me and mine to attain
With one final effort I burst through the rain
A silence descended, I started to smile
And I bathed in its glory, but just for a while
As I looked to the distance I started to pray
Seeing a thunderstorm heading my way
…
Where should I wander? there's nowhere in view
for me to reach safely from what will ensue
The sky is in turmoil, I'm drowned by the din
Lightening bolts flash and my mind's in a spin
As I stand here bewildered. I heard a voice say
“Who dares to disturb us? when we are at play”
“This mountain is sacred, access is denied
Death awaits humans, where gods do abide”
Old age sits upon me and death holds no fear
For some unknown forces have brought me to here
I cared not for warnings, or what they imply
The mountain keeps calling, I need to know why
The gods become angry they've something to prove
As I stand defiant refusing to move
I feel the earth tremble increasing my fears
And thunder comes rolling bombarding my ears
The mountain is lit like the Fourth of July
With flashes of lightening criss crossing the sky
Rain falls in torrents to dampen my pride
Suddenly, silence, the thunderstorm’s died
I stand there bewildered my minds in a daze
As I glance to the heavens the sky is ablaze
With flashes of brilliance that carpet the sky
They stir the emotions and water my eye
The skies gather round me, It’s peaceful and calm
No sign of the tempest that threatened to harm
Lost in the wonders of all I had seen
Quietly pondering, what could it all mean
I felt myself lifted. as one in a dream
Retracing my steps that began at the stream
Looking down at the mountain there isn't a doubt
The sands have descended, my Earth Time’s run out
Contentment sits on me, it all becomes clear
The need for the journey that brought me to here
My questions are answered at last I know why
As I join my ancestors, to dance cross the sky
..
It is believed by some that the Aurora Borealis (northern lights) are the spirits of those departed , and that to see them is the foreteller of death. I worked with this
Written September 29th, 2006
Author notes
This was a poem written in three parts. Redone as one piece for the contest being run by cricketjeff (Tell us the story) in rhyme
A contest entry
- Tell us the story (In rhyme) by cricketjeff.
3500 points, ended March 28, 67 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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I love it when you write like this. It's a pure pleasure to get lost in your fantasys. I see why this poem is up on top!
Love,
Amera♥
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I think Jeff has said it all, but I will just add my congratulations on the silver.
Jeff is quite right, I hope to see the Aurora before I am too old to travel.
A wonderful entry and mt pleasure to read it.
Sue x
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Sue's favourite thing in the world may well be the aurora! This however did not influence the judging which was solely on the basis of the quality of the story and poem. Silver in what is probably our toughest contest to date, fantastic but we expect no less from you!!!
Great entry and thanks for decorating the contest with it
Jeff and Sue
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My thank to both Sue and yourself for once again providing an excellent platform for so many wonderful poets. That i rated so high in this contest is i have to say is a great honour (i know not how i would have managed to select winners) Who could argue with the gold? seems like Amera and myself battle for that place of honour regular in your contests ( guess she pushes me on to better things) I have no problems standing just below her ( a wonderful poet) on the podium
Once again thank you both for a great contest and congratulations to the winners and all who made this contest just as enjoyable reading as it was writing for it
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I think that this poem is my favorite one ever. You have such a wonderful talent for drawing the reader inside the imagery. It's so beautiful.
Good luck in the contest.
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Magnificent
Detailed imagery that lingers in mind, perfect smooth flow just like the stream.
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I love the imagery in this poem and the rhyme scheme. Has a lovely musical flow to it... It's a great story that just seems to roll off the tongue.
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Ahh..I remember reading this & I like the story that
unfolds. Man versus nature. I like the emotions
behind this poem..very nice..take care.
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Outstanding poetic tale.
Such beauty and depth within the rhyme of your words and the imagery is amazing.
A very enjoyable read with a peaceful end.
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Amazing Poetry
Your words took me on a beautiful journey my friend wuith your stunning imager but a sad ending indeed. A pleasure to read from beginning to end. Thank you for sharing your vivid imagination with us. Never stop writing. You take care. Hugs, Sandy
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This is one sight I dream of going to see one day....marvellous poem and a treasure to keep forever-Bravo!
Hilly xxx
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Thank you Hilly it is always a joy to have your comments on my work (long may you do so ) I hope you get your dream though i hope the out come is not as it is at the end of this piece
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A wonderful piece that just keeps calling it's reader forward. I struggle a bit with this line 'where the sweet smell of pine wafting in on the breeze' But I bow to the master
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Thank you passim for taking time to read and comment The point you made about the line is a valid one and was mentioned bay another reader I had made a slight alteration to it and i think it reads better Never be afraid to point things out if you feel they need to be I am not so high above myself that i can not take advice form other poets or readers Thank you
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The imagery ...
had me from the onset of your poem. What a journey that was not only metaphoric but very well a journey that I have made as well and one that while challenging ... also rewarding. I appreciated the effort that went into this and your story is just down my alley! Thanks for posting it. j y
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thank you Joy for reading and also for the points you made to me concerning little changes that needed to be made These i have done and it read better Thank you i appreciate it
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This is beautiful. The rhyme and rhythm carried me (and I'm sure every reader) along from line to line, painting a beautiful picture. Thanks for sharing. Best of luck in the contest.
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Thank you Topnotchsy It is always pleasing to have the thoughts of ones fellow poets on ones work That you enjoyed this one is so good to hear One can not hope for more than entertain ones readers Thank you
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Delectable my friend! Although it was long, each stanza made me anticipate another. A story woven through the fabric of cleverly crafted words. Your rhyme is impeccable (always) and that makes it fun to read. Interesting and well worth the time. I shall revisit this to savor it again. Well done my friend! Not only a wonderful poet but masterful story teller as well!
Blessings,
Frogz~
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Thank you so much Frog sorry about the length of this piece ,but i always say it is the poem itself that decides its length.I am so pleased you felt drawn into is enough to complete the journey
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I bow to the Master
What perfect rhyme my friend. This is what you are revered for. So smooth, nothing forced. Everything makes sense and story line clean and enticing. This is one of the best pieces I have ever read by you. You do not need luck when you have this talent.
Jim
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Thank you Jim for such a wonderful comment I have to admit this piece is one that i enjoyed writing For it was much like the journey I had no idea where it would lead.The ending only came to me as i reached it .It was not in mind when i started I think that is what pleased me the most
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