Cradled with impatience
Half folded in wonder
My write lays claim
To a blushed lunatic
Tangled in exploration
My heels gravely click
Fluttering around
This prostitue of risk
One hundred silent bursts
Sit and cradle me
Virtually shoving my spine
Penetrating claim
Hushing the curve
Of a torrid sea of certain
I observe the leaving
Colliding with the rain
Author notes
Wanting and needing to write again, it's a start,...
What did you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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This is fantastic!
Here's a list of my favorite lines of this masterpiece:
1. "Half folded in wonder"
2. "My heels gravely click"
3."One hundred silent bursts"
4."Hushing the curve"
5."I observe the leaving"
I think your pen misses you too!
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This is so deep, excellent write.
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Oh I have known the solo dance of pacing back and forth, in front of the keyboards, brain cells locked up like a maximum security prism, with no colors leaking out,
hours staring at a word that refuses to conform into a line that straggles like the unemployed with no where else to go, denied stanzas when I sitting, and sitting in front of stanzas that I wish wouild turn and walk away. Then there are those
poems that come at inoppurtune times, with no way to write them down, and by the time I can get to them they are gone, They haunt me often. But
wneh the poem embraces my soul in a rush not unlike theh dizzying high of a kiss, it becomes worth all the suffering and emptiness one must deal with. I wish you well fair lady...you have had some hard times, and are deservining of some pretty rhymes and freed writes in your mind. ~~~superb write here by the way~~~Artis
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For some reason, I think the name of the poem should named something to effect of And the Rain Fell Down or 15 Signs of Rain. The undertones of the piece make me think of abuse or at least by some modern standards. I'm not entirely certain; but to my mind, it may be the complex love between two people. I like the aggressive metaphor-ing. Its got a rhythm that rolls and rolls, and then when the second stanza hits, its hits with force. Thanks for the prompt to look more carefully at my reading. It's always a joy to return a favor.
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Very nice
I always love nature images and the images here are very vivid great work!
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Hmm Nice.
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