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New Beginnings

When all before me is unsure
I sit and think awhile
to realise faith will endure
then go that extra mile.

I never look behind me now
for that would cause me pain
regain my sense of hope somehow
My dignity regain.

What's done is done, I realise
and cannot be repaired
I'm sure this comes as no surprise
So best you be prepared.

Come walk with me, your head held high
And tread a road that's new
Just kiss that troubled past goodbye
and find a brand new you.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • Frodofan
    March 6, 2009

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    I have to say, I found the last line just bordering on "corny" what with the sort of silly phrase, "brand new you" but I really liked everything else. It had a good rhythm and kept me reading.


    Thanks for entering.


    • Gwenevere
      March 7, 2009
      Edit | Reply
      I have to say I am surprised and a little dissapointed in your response to my words.There is nothing silly or corny about finding a brand new you.It happens.Take it from one who knows.I am a totally different person to who I was six years ago.To become that "new" person, I had to let go of an awful lot of baggage.I had to get out of my self made pit of self pity and move on, Ros

      • Frodofan
        March 7, 2009
        Edit | Reply
        The idea is understood, but the phrasing generic. Those were my thoughts.

  • Bad Bill gold member
    March 6, 2009

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    A very positive and also well-rhymed poem. I too was taken aback at the repetition of the word "regain". Perhaps if you concluded the line with "my dignity retain" instead, it would read better? Just a suggestion - the poem's fine anyway.

    Bill


  • Rovingone gold member
    March 5, 2009

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    A very optimistic write which would serve to give anyone hope and cheer. You always write so well and musically.


  • PoeticMadnesss
    March 5, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    great poem overall, i enjoyed reading it. the only part that confused me a bit was

    "regain my sense of hope somehow
    My dignity regain."

    i don't get why you used regain twice, and after reading it a few times it didn't make 100% sense to me (grammatically)

    nice flow to the words though. keep up the great work and good luck in the contest!


  • lovesky
    March 5, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    Really up beat poem filled with hope! Enjoyed reading thanks for sharing

1 - 7 of 7