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Streams...

I once drank
From the glory of you
Before the branding
Of your halo

But I still can't breathe

These puddles are painful
When your melody streams
I'm submerged
Beneath your surface

You leak slowly
Mixing love against me
And momentarily I contemplate
Your ripples of wonder

With will and age
Your pattern of tropical wave
Has exhausted the elements
Of more than my desire





Author notes

I have fought the erge to write for so long now, I have no choice but to
surrender to my thoughts...
So this will hopefully get me back to where I once was, and off to writing again...

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • rite
    March 15

    Edit | Reply
    While processing events that life presented to us we look for answers to questions that persistently occupy our minds. Some we find others remain hidden in future's den, waiting to be revealed to us when time is due. Over time we have found answers that we were unable to produce a long time ago. One time we will know them all. Until that time we have poetry and friends who care for us - each part of the process that we must go through. Stay strong. We are all part of The Light and though it may seem completely dark at times, to The Light we will return. Thank you for creating and sharing. Take care.


  • januaryrain gold member
    March 13

    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful, it spoke to me, it's nice to know someone else knows how you feel and pens is so beautifully. Thank you for sharing. Glad you stopped by, I will be reading more.


  • rollingzen
    March 13
    Edit | Reply
    be brave ... life is deep

  • rollingzen
    March 13
    Edit | Reply
    be brave


  • cubert
    March 4

    Edit | Reply
    been too long since you popped up on my new work by favourites list. glad to see you're back. your block-breaker here, it's good. definetly says things to me. I hope to see more.


  • quietly burning
    March 4
    Edit | Reply
    this is a painful stream, that hopefully will ferry you thru to the other side.

  • IamThe13thRaven
    March 4
    Edit | Reply
    After reading that, I dont understand why you wouldnt write all the time.

    Keep writing.


  • abybaby
    March 4

    Edit | Reply
    good write

    bud the middle stanza is nt coming through well i guess
    pls try to revise it if possible
    overall the poem was good

    cheers
    abybaby


  • Wolfdog silver member
    March 4

    Edit | Reply

    Superb

    I think 'tis a very fine write just as it is. You expressed your thoughts quite well. Thanks for sharing this one with us.

1 - 9 of 9