Dotty the dalmatian
Takes his mistress for a walk
Dotty drags his lady
All around the block
Dotty dreams of carriages
And rooms with hot log fires
Ladies lost in marriages
In lonesome English Shires.
Dotty the dalmatian
Wears spots upon his back
Pinkest tongue in whitest face
And his ears are black
Coiled like any watchspring
Filled with potent power
Like an exiled Scotch king
Locked in Croat tower.
Dotty the dalmatian
Tugs round the block again
Dragging now his mistress
Through the driving rain
Faster now and faster
Until they're lost to sight
White as alabaster
In the dark of night.
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
Dotty the imaginative dalmatian!
-
Lovely poem, Keith, with some clever touches, such as the Croat reference. My only quibble would be that I think the flow of the piece is a tad uneven in parts - no big deal, but I think you might tweak it a little.
Good poem anyhow,
Bill
-
-
Hi Bill.
I've done a bit of tweaking
With syllables and that
Tried it out in speaking
Shouted at the cat !
Some lines are just fine
Others run away
Just like that dalmatian
Pulling up the brae.
Some lines I've read nice and fast
Others rather slow
Couldn't make the rhythm last
Then words had to go
Counted on my fingers
Even used my toes
Still the odour lingers
Had to hold my nose.
You and I are picky
Counting every beat
Isn't poetry tricky ?
But writing it is sweet
Keep the comments coming
Grand to hear from you
And those little clappy men
Kind of like them, too!
Best Wishes, pal. Keep up the good work. I'd rather have honesty than awesomeness any day! Keith.
-
-
Loved your reply just as much as Dotty. On the subject of Dotty, last verse was my favourite. Slightly sombre. My favourite theme! x D
-
-
-
Beautiful image and what the dalmation would want his life to be, or contented maybe...well writtten. Blessings.
Adding your comment:
1 - 5 of 5
