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And Then There Was Three

Ohhhh it hurts,
Breathe in    and      out.
All over,      relax.
Okay, one more time,
Push,            Push harder          Good girl
Why so purple and bloody?          Normal
It's beautiful though
Honey, it's you and me
And "it" is a he.
See him look around, so distressed, and yet so wise.
Seemed so big then, now so small.
As he suckles I embark on a journey
To the night he became
How I've grown with joy, inside and out. 
I come back to the tune playing over your face,
Meant for my heart only.
One night of love evolved
Into these hours of pain and joy.

Author notes

I had an alternative ending but creative writing teacher nixed it:

What will this trio's future hold?
Sadly, a little more pain
But for the most part, just joy.

My son was born in 1989 and his father was not even there. This is my fantasy of how I would have liked it to be. The good news is that my father took over being a father to my son and he is a very nice 19-y-o.

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5
  • Topnotchsy
    March 11

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    Nice write. I like the way you portrayed the emotions. (And while I like the alternative ending as well, I do agree with your creative writing teacher, I really like the ending as is. It really offers the picture of the combined feelings of pain and joy.)


    • e911
      March 18

      Edit | Reply

      Thanks so much

      As Shrat values your comments, I do as well. I would recommend to anyone to go to their local community college and take a creative writing class. We submitted our writings every week and then we all sat in a circle and commented on what had been written for the week. It was just like this site, only you knew that you would get a comment from everyone in the class of say.... thirteen. Add to that that my instructor was very intelligent, intuitive and attractive and it just made the class so enjoyable. I usually always followed his edits.

      • Topnotchsy
        March 18
        Edit | Reply
        "Add to that that my instructor was very intelligent, intuitive and attractive."

        Hmmm, attractive. Did that improve the writing, or make it more difficult to focus?


  • rbruce gold member
    March 1

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    This is one I like very much. I have heard a lot about the pain of childbirth, and have seen the joy on new mothers faces many times. Great poem.


    • e911
      March 1
      Edit | Reply

      wow fast comment

      No one is usually up at this hour. Thanks for the comment. I wrote it so long ago. Funny when I think of my son now and then.

1 - 5 of 5