it’s almost as if
all the thoughts I have of you
run past me, on a busy train
and I am left
on an empty train station with
your ticket clutched in my hand
and my eyes
burning into the red blur of the
metal train, with your head popping out
like something
that doesn’t quite belong there.
Comments
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ooh nooooo.
u caught the mad cow disease!
(another questions to ponder about "what happens if a goldfish gets a fever?") i should become a vet! anyhoo. this poem is so beautiful and so sad in the ending. whyy?? tell me whyy cant u just make it happe like "omgosh!!! its a popping head, and i know who u are!"
i like how you linked so many things together in this awesome poem. it was um... well-linked. u should've taken history (just saying) aaanyways, i like the flow here and how well u linked it all. i mean, the train, the train station, and the red metal, and the ticket, SO WELL LINKED! (still trying to get over the fact that this was very well linked)
good job buddy! keep up the writing. and i love you and dont u ever forget my popping head!

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Good work
lol I agree, Great poem good message, love the imagery and the thoughts behind it. You done a great job with this . (QQ) There were no errors. No typos and nothing to change as far as i can see. I look forward to your next one. But if you don’t return the favor I will never Review you again.



