Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Secret Sins of Sodom

I. Silent man with a bleeding mouth becomes the faceless composer

I cut myself on angel’s hair
Because of a surgical addiction,
Exposing my black veins
Underneath my pale, white skin;
Like silhouettes in the sunset.                                 




II. You’re the acid in my lungs, the lacerations on my lips

Razorblade lipstick is my friend
Because its hate tastes so colorful
Coming out of my cold, hard lips.
It creates blood covered in frost;
The flavor of disease.




III. With crippled wings and a silver tongue, tortured angels fall to earth

Plastic lungs scream as a
Male’s falsetto echoes,
Bringing to life just how
Fake men can really be
When feeding their vultures.


















Author notes

Ok, so I know that there's almost every option in here, but in my head, it all makes sense, and that's all that matters, right?

So basically, each roman numeral signifies a different situation.

I- I'm thinking that this is lies being exposed. Silent man with a bleeding mouth is one who spits out lies (thus becoming a faceless composer). In the stanza, he is exposing himself for who he is, and what he does, in stark contrast to who he's pretending to be.

II- This is about hate. I'm sure if you think about it, it will explain itself.

III- This is about men taking things that aren't being given. It's about them selfishly "feeding their vultures," no matter what the cost.

For the record, I used 19 out of 26 of the options. It was really rather fun.


A contest entry

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

  • Beautiful Irony
    March 29

    Edit | Reply
    I think is a poem that cannot be seen as a stand-alone. You must have read the contest rules for it to make sense. So I shall critique it as a contest piece: this works, your imagery is fabulous, as always and I like it a lot. It's very, very dark. However, because it doesn't work independently of the contest it's a little flawed, but that's just my opinion Like I said, it's a great piece, I like it.


  • Maybe.I.Am.Broken.
    February 27

    Edit | Reply
    Now that I read the AN, it makes more sense this is a really good write sissy...and it doesn't rhyme XD lol.
    you did a brilliant job, keep writing.
    YBS
    Annie Shadows


  • SoundsOfSilence
    February 26

    Edit | Reply
    =D
    This is really good.
    I love it.
    Good luck in the contest.

    ~~silently-breaking


  • Rhythm Child
    February 26
    Edit | Reply
    i likey xD
    great entry
    thank you very much