I believe when you say that you're hurting
it means I should say something back to you
(but I don't think I can make any difference
with the words that I'm saying unless they're true).
I believed I had the power to heal.
There were times when time stood totally still
and I would swear that the moment between us was real.
Now I don't know what you expect me to feel -
I feel for you.
I know you watch me at night
as I stare in the darkness for something gone -
and it's true I'm haunted by you and the way
you're just not her.
I never thought I would end up this way -
i always thought a dog should have his day.
If I believed in God I believe I would pray,
but we both sit here with nothing to say -
I feel for you.
Two people frightened by the daylight
aching for the strength to see in the dark -
and all I have are the words that I scream in the stillness -
I feel for you.
Author notes
I'm playing guitar a little bit, again, so I dusted off these song lyrics from a few years back.
Comments
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I am glad to see that you are playing guitar again, and dusting off song lyrics might mean you will write some new ones soon? You are so creative (these are the first lyrics you've posted here, yes?)
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These song lyrics do work better as a song than as a poem. Here's why: In a song, you can frequently repeat things and the crowd will love it. Not so true about poetry, right?
I also noticed that the repetition didn't begin until about a third of the way through. That speed bump made it harder to get through the rest.
Well now, there's your bad stuff. The good stuff is that your vocabulary is superb, the mood and descriptive state are very good, and the sincerity are quite real. Someone once said that if you can fake sincerity you can fake anything! Either way, this is very good (even with the flaws).
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You still sing, right?
The lyrics are good, you've always been great with words and wording, so I'm not shocked one bit! I liked it...
~Kimberly~
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