I'm not quite White,
spoony fairy-tale secrets...
archaically encrypted in,
hushed Ivory discretion.
Tar brush, dipped in honey pot~
painted my temporal arbor,
with Gadarene Cherokee~
not olive branches.
My unconditional man,
his lush African mouth;
milk-chocolate sheathing,
and Seminole-everglade vision...
counts coup on foolish wisdom~
Black Brothers disquieted, fretted,
“Man, better stick with your own kind."
Aryan Brotherhood's
burnt-cross hackle points, warned,
“You better, stick with your own kind!"
Think he listened?
Myriad choices, moving mountains,
the only boxes he ever checked...
Those diminution labels,
are fully packed with rabid dog's
leavings, on groomed verdant lawns.
Author notes
A contest entry for: Contest Birds of a Feather by Hoosierpoet
Fight for the Gold: Prewrites Unlimited #1 by amaranthine lover
A contest entry
- Vocabulary Word Contest III - by Bear by Arkbear.
750 points, ended March 6, 5 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Birds of a Feather by Hoosierpoet.
700 points, ended August 10, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
whatever you feel is right
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Beautifully written, and fits well into this contest. thanks so much for the submission.
Moses -
Reason for Removal:
ONLY HMS OR NO HMS ARE ALLOWED TO BE ENTERED.
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Times of longing for good Poetry make me read as much as I can.....time between Great Poetry, pushes me past wee hours to find something good enough to end my day......and today I have read something which surpasses all that is good.....greatness is indeed your gift......you managed to make me stop....ponder, and appreciate the written word one again -
You quickly became one of my Fav Poets.....I have a feeling you will touch my soul many times during our journey together....God bless you & thank you for entering,
Bear -
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Now you made me cry Bear, what a wonderful thing to say about my poem Burnt Cross, and about me as a poet.
I am seriously sobbing my joy.
Thank you for this and for the Gold -
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...take a look at your Reviewers....they are top-notch Poets....this shines upon you as a Writer & Poet...and speaks volumnes about your talent....God bless you!
Bear -
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this speaks volumes about your talent as poetess and about the soul of you.this piece is indeed creative and very well structured. it rings with a beauty that reflects throughout your soul and it burns bright. my best to you in the contest.
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queenie, I thank you for reading and leaving such a nice comment on my poem. For me always writing a flowery dance isn't enough. I need to go to the gut and belly dance, now and then.
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Nice piece that you have penned best to you in Bears contest blessings always be well.
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Ah, thank you Stars for dropping by and leaving such a kind comment. I really enjoyed your poem too.
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Wow. I am so pleased to have read this tonight. Such a deep and moving piece that speaks to the foolish self-righteous with indifference and strength.
Think he listened?
Loved that. Simply excellence at every level. A mature and knowledgeable write that stirs the human element in so many ways.
Well done. ~Pamela
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Pamela, what a treasure you always are to me. I have been sadly too busy lately to be very poetic. I like to think of times like these as gathering materials for my next poems.
You continue to warm my heart with your comments, t
Thank you so much
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there is depth to this:
beginning with less than perfect religion, then the opinion of family mixed with society's intolerance
and, in the end an attitude of indifference to the self righteousness.
apt and excellent!
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Thank you "not so" Idle Mind, I truly appreciate your taking the time to read and leave your awesome comment. Thank you for this.
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There is weight here and it is marvelous to heft onto my comprehension! I adored the variety of shadings used here, an alluding that nothing really is pure black or white. I like the flaunting of attitude at the end and really, the whole of this
consumes one in a tangible choice lived and unregretted. Blue
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Wow Blue, what a great comment to give my poem. It is affirmation of the highest order, it cannot help but wrap me in thankfulness.
Thank you so much!
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I like this though I can't say exactly why
Maybe I'm too tired right now. Mostly I get "feel" from this, rather than specific comprehension. The only criticism I can offer at that time is: in line 17, is "points" used as a noun or a verb? If a verb, maybe change to past tense?
I like the flavors of words you use: "Tar brush, dipped in honey pot" "milk-chocolate sheathing," and the way you combine words to evoke a combination of meaning: "Seminole-everglade vision". I had thought of suggesting moving "leavings" from the beginning of the last line to the one previous. However, I think it is better where it stands.
Love the impact of that final stanza. Nice use of the word "diminution."
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Thank you Bear Woman, for your constructive comments on this poem. I intended "points" as a noun in my write but I appreciate your expertise very much.
Loved that you liked it!
(Pssst, Bear wouldn't she make a marvelous Judge?)
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You are very welcome. "Points" is more effectively used there as a noun, and I very much enjoy the way that combination of words "burnt-cross hackle points" feels. I see a dog (or rather a wolf)'s hackles raised, the tips singed and smoking from being so close to a burning cross. On guard and ready if necessary to fight those Aryans in which per is embedded / with whom per is embroiled (but hopefully not "broiled"! lol!) Alternately, it is the Aryan "dogs" whose hackles are raised in aggression. Nice double meaning.
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