hey there love
whats that that you have on?
those clothes are not for protection
take those off
lets feel the sky fall down before it rots
maybe I'm crazy, or crazy in love with you
why do you ask me to forget about it?
our love has transited
from lofty things to well placed dreams
if only you could have loved me
with the same way i dreamed of you loving me
but you let us fall, drop down
through this sky like we are dead
limp bodies falling down instead
of lovers taking clothes off and feeling
as the sun burns us up like the passion
in my heart. wish it were true, but instead,
'im saying the strangest things you've ever heard
give me your hands my dove,
i will show you what i mean to be in love
cutting through the clouds, cutting through the shroud
but instead I'm cutting through the flesh
cursing the name that's yours
rain falling through the sky,
blood red rain
no, you said,
all of this love is in my head
now I'm falling as if i am dead
A contest entry
- All that's left are these pretty words. by Candy Morphine.
400 points, ended April 14, 37 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
your response is requested, but not demanded
Comments
-
"maybe I'm crazy, or crazy in love with you"
love that bit...
great write...
hope you do well in the contest!
XoXo -
take those off
-Very much liking the succient motion that line is written in=]
if only you could have loved me
with the same way i dreamed of you loving me
but you let us fall, drop down
-Aww i love everything about that delusional stanza. It's fucking adorable.
limp bodies falling down instead
of lovers taking clothes off and feeling
-Really good contrast between the two. Quite effective.
the ending=perfect.
I really, really enjoyed this. It flowed well and was very relatable.
Finalist=]
-
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well.
thank you.
-
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lol; why not?
Lyric:
"Drop, drop, drop it down like you've dropped dead. Cut, cut, cut it up like a suicide attempt"
Title:
"The sky is falling through"
Picture:
http://andikapatrya.deviantart.com/art/Is-this-Love-105384621
((that's such a pretty picture!))
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