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The Begining of Something Benevolent



In your eyes, I see that twinkle that only means betrayal. The note in my hand, I slowly read aloud, to fuel your foolish demands. I love you sweetheart, it reads as he whispers for me to stop, it's only you... Never her.

 

I'm her, broken and incomplete. Sitting on the edge of the honeymoon suete bed, stoned on this cruel reality. You sit beside me now, your arms slither slowly around my shoulders. I shrug them off, as I can smell her Chanel on your shirt - how did I never manage to see this before?

"It seems you made your own choice on who you want. I hope you have a nice life with... her." I whimper, as my clammy hands clutch at the malevolent piece of a heartbreak letter. Your eyes focus on mine for one second and I see a pleading--your pupils large and iris diluted, I nearly crumble into your clumbsy, cheating hands.

"We've only just got married.."  You lull into my ear. I turn around and look at you oncemore, regretting the words I am now to speak.

"Is that the only reason you feel bad?" I plea. "Well why else would I be?"

You destroy me.

Author notes

crapcrapcrapcrapcrap.
can't write prose lol.
well maybe sometimes. bleh.

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10
  • Awh, you can too write prose. I liked the story you've written and that's pretty much what prose is, except with pretty words... and you definitely have those.


  • Lowell Poe
    March 10

    Edit | Reply
    ahhh...the shallow male....
    This seemed like it was actually unfolding as I read.
    Sad beauty done in great form,
    Like a corkscrew to the heart lass.
    Intense piece of work.
    You should be proud of this.

    Blessings always,
    Lowell

  • ...truly amazing. I love the images it gives off.


  • charcoal
    February 24
    Edit | Reply
    in the honeymoon suite ?

    O:

    you destroy me

  • Men are stupid lol
    a sad tale you have told


  • amaranthine lover gold member
    February 24
    Edit | Reply
    I especially love the last line, it's brilliant & absolutely killer!


  • Cerulean Sunrise gold member
    February 24
    Edit | Reply
    Well crafted.

    I find myself in total disagreement with your ANs.


  • Girl-Interrupted gold member
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    This has such appeal.... it immediately grabbed and captured my attention....

    becca


  • Immortal Obscurity Greeters member
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    Shut up yourself. Lol.

    You so don't suck. In fact, your sensory appeal alone is enough to leave your reader craving more. I smelled the perfume, breathed the same dense air, and for those few moments, you had my full attention.

    Well done & good luck love ♥

  • ElectricBloom
    February 24

    Edit | Reply
    wow, that first sentence is amazing! it really grabbed my attention and pulled me into the rest of the piece. this is filled with emotion and has excellent description throughout. i love your take on the prompt!

    best of luck in the contest,

    ElectricBloom

1 - 10 of 10