The orange-yellow epiphyte
clings to the branch,
like a lover clings
to a beloved.
It's complexity and
grandeur are shown
as delicately the petals
move in the wind.
The fragrance of kings
wafts through the breeze.
It tantalises the senses
and tickles our tastebuds.
As we capture for a moment
a taste of luxury
emitted from the
luscious flower of true love.
To taste the exquisite, delicate orchid blossom.
Author notes
Will probably edit again lol. some of the things in this poem are specific to orchids
In a list
A contest entry
- Something beautiful by Brlsbb.
700 points, ended March 10, 15 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - the audition round. by stargazer..
800 points, ended May 21, 54 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I'm Crazy....but OH WELL!!! PREWRITE CONTEST!!!! by Kathraina.
575 points, ended April 18, 296 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The Best of the Best by Desdmona.
1400 points, ended April 1, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pretty much a free-for-all, Boys and Girls. by Cherry Hades.
400 points, ended April 20, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - About Something Green by Kiddy.
600 points, ended April 9, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - I WANT ANYTHING! by Umi Juvariel.
4300 points, ended April 9, 369 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
How was this one??
Comments
1 - 73 of 73
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Good Write
Loved this one from start to finish. I am glad I stopped in to read some of your work, and will be reading more!
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very nice work full of imagery keep uop the great work....
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Interesting use of imagery in this piece. It really made the orchid in question come to life. Excellent write and good luck in my contest.
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Thank you for the read. I will be stopping by to read more of your work
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very nice observations. Great job there.
Thanks for entering
Kiddy's score - 47
Dr.Veer's score - 45.5
Total - 92.5
Love
Kiddy -
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Wow thats a pretty good score sweet
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This is lovely!! I love orchids and you have captured some uniques things here.
Khia -
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Thank you
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I like how you said the taste of the orchid and your diction was increducious. I could see the flower blooming. Good job and good luck! ~Des
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Thanks for the read
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Lovely write!
Great imagery and flow here. I like the orchid aspect.
Bravo!!!
♥ kate -
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Thank you
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lovely imagery...exquisite stuff...
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Ooh, very beautifully penned.
Gorgeous imagery expressed
and clever thoughts.
Thanks for entering & best of luck -
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Thanks for reading
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Originality: (9/10)
Emotion: (7/10)
Poetic devices: (15/20)
Structure/flow: (8/10)
Cohension: (8/10)
Title relating to poem: (10/10)
Personal opinion: (8/10)
Syntax: (7/10)
Diction: (8/10)
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Total:80
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That is still a B yay
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Flowers and nature in general is beautiful and you've captured the beauty in this poem. Thanks for entering and good luck.
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I own many orchids.
Liked this very much. -
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Glad you enjoyed it
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This is beautiful! I especially love these lines:
"As we capture for a moment
a taste of luxury
emitted from the
luscious flower of true love."
What a lovely image! Nice job! -
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Thank you
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i choose this poem as one of the finalists, the language is very detaled and the imagrey is very good. There are parts that i could just see and smell and taste. I thought it was great thank you for the great write. It is indeed beautiful, but there are a few parts i was unsure of
"As we capture for a moment
a taste of luxury"
while the line is very pretty I have a few issues with it.. -
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Thank you for the gold trophey.
Taste of luxury refers to royals. If you know anything about orchids you would know at one time they were reserved for only the rich and the royal families due to their rarity. Commoners were never given such a taste of luxury until much later
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Lovely flower
lol I did not know they were poison and your poem made me want to go and taste one. Glad you mentioned they are poisonous. Great poem.
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lol Yeah I had a friend read this and then try to eat one... I told her the poem meant a figurative taste and not a real one... It was humorous nonetheless.
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This poem creates such great imagery, Ive read this poem a few times over and each time it gets stronger, no fault to be found.
A truely great read, I look forward to reading any future poems you may post.
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Im glad you enjoyed this piece. It is the best Ive written in a very long time
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The title pulled me in for a very good read. One comment on flow - replace to period after tastebuds with a comma. That makes the last stanza a complete sentence. Beautiful.
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Thank you for your suggestion it was very helpful
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Captivating
A breathtaking image of love romance
and passion expressed in metaphors
of natural essence. Lovely write my friend.
Exquisite! keep that pen alive
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Thank you for the read
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Tis interesting.
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Interesting how?
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thank you so much for the poem
it is beautiful good luck in the contest..
my favorite lines
"The fragrance of kings
wafts through the breeze." -
this was very descriptive and very real! i loved it! great job!
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This is my fav poem that I have ever written. im glad you liked it
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this is so good it feels so real
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Thanks. Its one of my fav poems that I have ever written
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Strong
I feel like I can walk through this place you've made...
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Thank you. That was my goal with this piece
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i think this is a fantastic write, very good imagery and just wow. Awesome Job, you did very well with this poem, I like it very much, keep up the good work!
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thank you so much... its funny how many ppl think i did so well on this but thank you all the same
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Begins well, then things seem to lose clarity.
I think the first two stanzas are excellent, both as descriptions of orchids, and as a metaphor for love.
Perhaps lines 12 & 16 are a bit trite compaired to the metaphors used elsewhere.
I wonder if the poem might be stronger if line 17 were omitted?
I question the repetition of 'taste' three times. That seems to detract from the visual, tactile and olfactory images of the orchid.
Like the fragrance of the orchid, sometimes subtlety is the best way to speak of love.
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Thank you for the suggestions I have taken them into consideration.
-deadly
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imagery!
one can actually sense the flower while reading your words, how wonderfully written they are! thank you for sharing!
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The fragrance of kings
wafts through the air.
It tantalises the senses
and tickles our tastebuds
that is so cool. tickles our tastebuds--that made my tongue water. thank you for sharing this with me today. i wish you well in the contests you have entered with this write and am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie
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Wow so many times I have tried the capture delicate nature of an exquisite flower and you have done it in this wonderful write ..excellent poet
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thank you
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Lovely!
I learned a new word: epiphyte! Love the flow of this visually pleasing & scentful poem. Delightful word choice & presentation. All the best in the Contest.
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dont you love learning new words i know i do
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Wow as Edwardlover said Beautiful Imagery I enjoyed this Poem, I read it a few times to get the full image.
Great Write
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I don't reall suggest much to change mostly i just wantted to say that you really gave me the vision of this orchid! Fantastic imagary!!!
good work
tibby -
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thank you
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This is a lovely write but I have never known a scented orchid but then the ones here would be forced grown. They certainly are beautiful and exotic though and so many varieties.
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orchids are scented. the chinese refer to them as the kings fragrance in ancient times
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"The fragrance of kings
wafts through the air.
It tantalises the senses
and tickles our tastebuds."
I really liked these two lines. Very captivating piece, but I have to say it... Aren't orchids extremely poisionous? Or is that what you were getting at?
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yes they are poisonous but their poison would be tantilizing:
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Tantilizing to death, lol. Really good write though.
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It just so happens that my favorite flower is an orchid, haha. The title just grabbed me; so glad that it did, as well. This is very descriptive & I fell in love with the imagery. Good luck in your contest.
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poor boy...deserves 5 stars.
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Stop and smell them lass.
Just delightful !
Fragrance in words.....
touching poetically on all five senses ..
I would leave this ...
it has the feeling of strolling from the avenue into a quaint little flower shop.
Charming lass,
Lowell Poe. -
A very elegant penning dear, well formed and thought out.
All the best,
mj.
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Wellllllllllllllllllllllllllll;
I am not a fan of any flowers, whatsoever, I actually hate them with a passion. This piece, I feel obliged to say, was completely and totally enticing, and I loved it. -
"fragrance of kings
wafts through the air" it's such a beautiful.
You call orchid "the luscious flower of true love".
I like it.
Well done
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I love this, so, much. The imagery is phenomenal and the "t" sounds in the third stanza are to die for. Alliteration and word games (loved and beloved, luscious love, etc.)
Awesome poem, I wouldn't change a thing
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Thank you. Im suprised you wouldnt change a thing i wrote this in two minutes, no joke lol
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Second verse just spell delicately correctly
To me the last line loses something
Just not a poetic as the rest?
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you do realize you dont have to be so rude in your comments
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very nice
I nice dance and hint around sexual intimacy...good write.
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i look forward to it
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it is up now
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