She is soprano, diaphragm flitting like butterflies to push the voices of reason above the crowd, and he is baritone; smooth, decadent, and a stark contrast to her crystalline echo. She insists on screaming choruses in three-four-time and no one can hear him as he whispers the verses in b-flat-minor.
Unwilling partners in passion's duet, the only sound is dissonance hovering like an ominous crimson flag, which threatens to crush them both in a stunning crescendo of thunder and tears. She sings like a thousand castrated choir-boys, but remains convinced that her voice is the purest, and he continues coughing the rests in perfect rhythm with her caterwauling.
"Did anyone ever tell you you're tone-deaf?"
Their voices crash against the heavens, suddenly swelling in harmonious fusions of fire and blood. Glass and violet pulse violently in a symphony greater than any other, and the angels cry skeletal tears over Beethoven's grave, grieving the cadence of love's last breath.
Author notes
prompt:
"The same passions in man and woman nonetheless differ in tempo; hence man and woman do not cease misunderstanding one another. ~Friedrich Nietzsche
The last line was inspired by the song "Cadence Of Her Last Breath" by Nightwish, which I happened to be listening to at the time.
A contest entry
- Contest Quickie by Dragonbabyx3.
700 points, ended February 22, 2009, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Fluff is great, but it really doesn't help; honesty is the best policy.
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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I loved this! Great job! I think you're a great writer, I love reading your works.
A few things stuck out to me, though, especially "in a stunning crescendo of blood and tears" and "harmonious fusions of fire and blood". The first one's "blood and tears" didn't seem original enough for the rest of the piece, and "fire and blood" brought that previous idea to mind as well. Have you thought about changing the first and taking "blood" out of the second?
I hope my critique helps.
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shoot. i knew i forgot something.
thanks 
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After reading through this piece a few times, I found myself experiencing the 'deapth' of the story.
Your use of beautiful words stirs 'good old fashioned' emotional responses. Good luck in the contest. -
I love this. It shows the attraction of opposites and the way you described them through voice, it shows how even two things so different have the capability of creating beauty.
Shari
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oh wow! such talent! thought provoking and intense! me likes :-) spiralling in jealousy of your so very talented write...
gold trophy quality! amazing!
*tomps
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another grooovy read
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Enjoyed reading your take on the prompt, well done to you with this. good luck in the contest
Juls
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Nicely done.
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WOW! I loved the second stanza in its entirety! Great take on the prompt! Wonderful work!
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She sings like a thousand castrated choir-boys
that's brilliant.
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You should write like this more often my beautiful cohort.
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