When you close your eyes
with me each night
Things are always great
they just feel so right.
I can't hide how I feel
neither can you I know
Can things really be this way
that our hearts will forever show.
This love that we share so strong
where two hearts join as one
Now is the time that I know
that true love has begun.
Now I wake up each day
feeling like I'm lost in this place
Now that you're no longer here
my heart is just an empty space.
Author notes
Option 6
In a list
- A group devoted to friendship group list • next in list
A contest entry
- Quickie(ish) XD by xDemonicxAngelx.
550 points, ended February 26, 19 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please don't critique this.
Comments
1 - 47 of 47
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wow
this is a powerful write. i love the image this putts off. a very good write and congrates on the honorable winner. -
Empty Space says it all once you read the poem. It is a very well written poem. Congratulations on writing it.....and if based in real experience, I'm sorry the space is
empty now. -
wonderment indeed
very nice use of words, they flow perfectly this is a nice piece of work here good job i love it !!!!!!
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beautiful
wow your poems are just so amazing a true artist you are.
love reading your work thank-you for sharing take care my friend
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this is so beautiful....this is how love should feel...
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wow
this is very beautiful i like it
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I absoutely loved it
great write as always see and you say I am better than thee way s keep it up Searra
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wow this is incredible, something so sad can be so beautiful at the same time, im always impressed with your poetry! keepup the terrific emotions that you put into your work!
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congrats on the trophy....the empty space is filled with love and longing.....and that is pure romance too...
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very pretty
well written....very nice and very surprising at the end....great work.
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it was very pretty. though the last stanza was quite a surprise... to turn it out to be the opposite of it all in a way. very sad
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Good depiction of the emptiness and incomplteness we feel when love is gone. Vous etes magnifique.
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A lovely poem, the only thing I would do is go back and double check puctuation, there seems to be some missing throughout xxx well done xxx
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oh wow don't I know this feeling. great write. keep it up
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I enjoy this peice. The feeling of when a lover has left does leave you feeling empty.
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awe this is just so well written. I must say that I do truly like it. I like the emotions that you have put into this... so personal yet ones that we can all relate to. Thanks for sharing this with us.
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This love that we share so strong
where two hearts join as one
Now is the time that I know
that true love has begun.
We all long for this, and yet, it seems to always end up the same. Great write! -
Is it relating to the group?
it's a nice piece, but send one that matches the theme of Group
by
the poet of hearts and beautiful words
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Sad, and beautiful.
Good write.
(P.S. i like your colors.)
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Superb!
This reminds me of my fiancee & I because we're separated by so many miles. Great passion expressed here. Good one, brother.
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Woo
This is a great poem .. lotsa feelings and emotions, good luck in the contests and grats on the Honorable Winner .
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wow, that was a really awesome poem. good luck!
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great poem. it really describes how some1 feels about anothe
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Very nicely penned. Love the twist at the end, from happy to sad. Well written, good luck in your contest
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interesting poem which is different as the perspectives change gradually and the emotions were powerful.
It almost made me sad that the love shared is lost and may never be gotten back. Nice style.
~transit~
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I can most definitely relate to what you have expressed here, and you've captured the emotion wonderfully.
Great Write! One of my favorites from you.
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Oh that is so sad, I know the feeling. Great emotion throughout, but wasn't expecting the sad ending but then we never do, do we.
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wonderful
Thats how me and my new husband is and we would go out of our way for each other thats true love. It was a pleasure to read ypur work.
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I can relate to this completly, this is an awesome write keep it up.
take care
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it's beautiful. i can definitely relate to this piece.
it's wonderful!
good luck in the contest!
kAsSiE
empty spaces fill up with something new, something better.
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I absoutely loved it
this is good as always great job
s
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Great poem, it goes from happy to sad, the sudden change is a bit unsettling could have a stronger transition but over all I really like it. It is really emotional and visually strong. Great job!
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a awesome write....
bt try to retouch des lines....i think they dnt bring out ur feelings properly
This love that we share so strong
where two hearts join as one
Now is the time that I know
that true love has begun
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that last stanza really hits hard... maybe because i didn't brace myself for it... well done . i lked the twist at the end
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A beautiful poem so well written. The ending came as quite a surprise. May God bless you,
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Wow!
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wow! this poem is amazing. i really wasnt expecting that ending, but it goes really well with the poem. great job, GL in the contest!
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Joel,
Hmmmm... very powerful and yes, intense. That ending is very gripping and unexpected! Well written, my friend. Keep the ink flowing and good luck! Love and hugs...
~Donna~
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Powerful
Sad ending, but very intense write. So very well expressed. Best of luck in the contest.
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Aww. That's so sweet, but very sad. True love only within dreaming. I know how that feels sometimes. Good luck in the contest. I hope you place.
**siempre**
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great job here. Thanks for sharing this piece with me.
Good luck in the contest.
Love
Passions
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good job
these are the feelings someone has after true love has begun after feeling like I m lost in this place
now without someone loneliness begins.
every girl needs a boy
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a deep and poem full of great depth of feelings throughout good luck in the contestmaralisa
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This sounded like a happy poem until the end! this is so sad! a great write though, you did realy well on this, keep the pen flowing and i hope all is well
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this is sad but very well written. I could feel the pain of loss coming from the piece. Best of luck to you in the contest.
-Steve-
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The life is like this and this is like the life dear one..you are so true and impressive as well..while stating the truth..well done..
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I liked this very much, it is sad, but it is what we feel when love leaves.. Your honesty is very touching..
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