Jakob—
it's odd, knowing it's been a year
and yet your name still gives xylophone jitters
down my frozen-Jello spine;
I should have known that you'd still hold me tight—
what matters a winter's passing when the bitter remembrance still remains?
I still sing songs about fallen frightened royalty,
her broken-ice-crown freezing her white skin
as her black-dyed eyes stare at he who took away her humanity
and left her nothing more than just another wild animal to add to his collection—
and the melody still feels like my cage
in the twisted strains of your oddly perverted reality.
I am Alice reborn today;
as those around me bathe in hot vermillion lifeblood and call it
"love",
I am frozen tight in your dead fingers' clutches as I swim— as I choke—
as I drown—
suffocating in navy-blue tears of valentines past
that no-one will ever see.
ii.
Zachary, your name was; I knew this from the start, though you were far from the one who told me;
it reminded me somewhat of my brother, and I clung to that thought that your names could somehow make you the same entity
as I felt myself slipping into your lime-green influence—
that crackling halo of electricity that held me enthralled
as just another moth trying to escape the perfect death
while still yearning to return to it, wrap its small body inside it and be warm for the split second its tiny heart still flutters.
you caught me on fire far too quickly and left me in empty ashes
again.
and yes, it hurts, but sometimes I think pain's just what I need—
that darkly insidious spiderweb sickness that you incite in me can only be cured by a blade's caress, you know.
slice my heart into tiny pieces so perhaps I might stitch it back together and be beautiful for once.
iii.
clear the floor for my hazy-eyed superhero.
Author notes
-hides title- Shut up.
For Angel— Option 5.
For Sarah— Jakob, Zachary, lime green, and navy blue.
A contest entry
- round four; haphazard by broken-colours.
900 points, ended March 20, 4 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Angel's (thats me XD) Rounds contest!!!! by The Reapers Angel.
700 points, ended February 24, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - AP X Factor 2 - Auditions by sideways hourglass.
550 points, ended February 27, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Best Prewrites! by movedon.
1750 points, ended May 8, 363 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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BRILLIANCE
and yet your name still gives xylophone jitters
down my frozen-Jello spine
now that is one of the most original,fantastic and utterly unique lines i think i have ever read. Brilliant. No wonder you won my rhythm children contest. Great write. -
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Ooh.
Thank you so much! -
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dont mention it

your a very good writer
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Still. Gratitude must be expressed.
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indeed it does xD
whats your favourite poem you have written ?
i need something good to read lol
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dont mention it

your a very good writer
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Relation to Prompts given: 6/10
Title: 1/5
Beginning And Ending: 4/5
Originality: 10/10
Emotion: 10/10
Imagery: 10/10
Structure: 8/10
Flow: 9/10
Vocabulary: 9/10
Comprehension: 9/10
Personal Opinion: 9/10
Overall score: 85/100 -
Relation to Prompts given: 8/10
Title: 1/5
Beginning And Ending: 4/5
Originality: 10/10
Emotion: 10/10
Imagery: 10/10
Structure: 8/10
Flow: 9/10
Vocabulary: 10/10
Comprehension: 9/10
Personal Opinion: 9/10
Overall score: 88/100 -
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Rofls! Always the title, innit? -has deep and driving inability to avoid Doctor Who references-
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If it wasn't for that, you might have won bronze, ma'am!
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-innocent grin-
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good job
you did a good job with this, excellent write! Keep up the good work hun! -
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Thank you.
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Yes.
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"and yes, it hurts, but sometimes I think pain's just what I need— that darkly insidious spiderweb sickness that you incite in me can only be cured by a blade's caress, you know."
Sorrowful, near the end it almost made me cry... T-T
Beautifully sick and incredibly deep, I love it.
Thank you for your entry. ~Angel

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yes.
I really liked the ending.
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Yes.
I thought this was pretty good.
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Thank you.
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