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Treacherous Waters (Rictameter)




Cruel waves

fold bob my body;

unfriendly waters spit

out of control now, tsunami

spreadeagles my soaking, shaking frame close

to jagged rocks and unfriendly

I'm being sweeped away

suffering the

cruel waves

Author notes

Treacherous Waters - Rictameter Form

Syllable count: 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 8, 6, 4, 2

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments


  • Paloszoo gold member
    March 10, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    I really like the concept of this piece. The imagery is great! Check your syllable count in the second line Thanks for entering my contest and for writing for me. Good luck. It’s an honor to have you show your work here!


  • Shari-Lei gold member
    February 23, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    You have way more patience then me, doing form!
    Great piece that is stark and personal. Personification of the way you feel being like a raging sea is well done.

    Best to you in the contest.
    Shari