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The moment.

It's hard to believe,
What lay in a simple moment,
How each one, in all it's exquisite nature can define who we are,
And how everything we know can change
In an instant.

Turn away,
Regret too quickly,
Pull back too fast.

What secrets hide within a moment,
Seemingly innocent,
Seemingly modest.
Precious, heartfelt, tear-jerking, movie-making moments,
The ones we remember, the ones that make us who we need to be.

I'd like to tell how those perfect moments are created,
But I'll get back to you.

Author notes

I had somewhat of an epiphany today, I realised that I take far too much for granted, and that there's someone I should be appreciating much more than I have been doing. I was thinking back to the moment I realised I needed that person, I got to thinking about all these little moments and how they've changed me. And this was the outcome.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • alexandra.
    February 21

    Edit | Reply
    emily, emily, emily, emily...

    this is beautiful....
    and that's the biggest compliment i give for writings.
    ever.



    loveyou,
    xxx.


  • amartya
    February 21

    Edit | Reply

    Great piece

    Freakout,

     

    The feeling you wanted to potray has been done VERY well indeed. Such feelings manifests themselves only at spur-of-the-moment and you have captured the moment excellently.

     

     

    About constructive criticism: It's a very vague term, often misused. Hopefully, you will find the following constructive.

     

    I thought that a few lines can be relaid - only relaid and not re-written.

     

    For example,

     

    You wrote:

    --------------------------------------------------------------

    It's hard to believe,
    What lay in a simple moment,
    How each one, in all it's exquisite nature can define who we are,
    And how everything we know can change
    In an instant.

    ---------------------------------------------------------------

     

    My suggestion:

     

    ----------------------------------------------------------------

    It's hard to believe
    what lay in a simple
    moment.
    How each one
    in all it's exquisite nature
    can define who we are.

    And how everything

    we change in an

    instant.

    ------------------------------------------------------------------

     

     

    Respectfully,

     

    Amartya

     

    PS: I invite you to read some of my poems. :)