The feeding cattle in the field
Simply stand and watch, caring naught.
He walks the road, expecting cars to come
From behind; where he has been, going slow
Enough to stop. To pick him up, take him
Forward to his destination - without fuss
Or payment. He is old, he has time on
His hands. A weekly journey makes a change
to the boredom of his existence, alone.
He carries with him the things he's needing;
A plastic bag, water bottle, wallet
I presume. I ask his destination,
"The bank will be okay. I'd like to get
Some money to buy a little food."
Author notes
Written in the style of Wordsworth with particular reference to "Animal Tranquility and Decay' found in a book of Selected Poetry by Wordsworth: - Modern Literary College Edition.
Option 3.
Tom is real, he would rather walk the 35 kilometres from his village to town than 'beg' a lift. he is independent to a fault.
In a list
A contest entry
- WONDERFUL WILLIAM by Old Poetry.
1500 points, ended April 14, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
comment if you wish
Comments
1 - 32 of 32
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Bob
I look inside your words a see the dark side of humamity. I now wonder , is there a God who watches over us a gives just rewards? Peace to you my friend.
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Sadly Bob, there is a dark side to humanity. I have picked up Old tom many times and taken him to Coonabarrabran. I know so little about him, now I will never know. he cannot speak properly as a result of his stroke. It's quite heart breaking when you think that that old man could easily have been me. What went wrong and when?
There is a God, my friend, and he is watching. One day we, as a species, will be called to account. I hope I am long gone when that day comes.
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wow,.. this is a good piece fo work.. good u made us know this 'Tom'..
and the subject chosen is superb too
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Many thanks for your comments. I am grateful for any feedback I get from this poem as it is a departure from the style I usually feel comfortable using. It's based on an old man I see on our road frequently, who lives in the village just down from our place.
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There is a tenderness in this man's simplicity and independence that resonates the finer points of mankind within.
For this moment, I wanted to be Tom. Excellent. ~Pamela
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Thank you Pamela, Old Tom is a real character and I tried to do justice to him as an individual. I admire his independent spirit even as I try to give him a hand on his weekly journeys.
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What a tranquil image you have painted with this one.The world moves far to fast now days and to find someone who is prepared to slow it down to his own pace is something we all would wish to do
A most enjoyable read Good luck in the contest
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Thank you, I really appreciate your comments and thoughts. My home is in a quiet country backwater but "Old Tom" goes back to another era where life was slower. I admire him and his choice of lifestyle.
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hey
coo -
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I like a challenge and this one was very hard to do. I am told it came out well. I thank you for visiting my page.
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Really enjoyed this read, also like the style...
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Thanks so much. This quite a change from my usual style. I owe Oldpoetry for making the challenge.
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A delightful personal version of: http://oldpoetry.com/opoem/9125-William-Wordsworth-Animal-Tranquility-And-Decay
Succinct in your delivery Bob and a lovely 'word' picture. Von
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Many thanks Von, It was a hard one to write even when the person was known to me. Wordsworth is a difficult act to imitate.
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http://oldpoetry.com/opoem/9125-William-Wordsworth-Animal-Tranquility-And-Decay
Thank you for introducing me to a W.W. poem I haven't read before and for your new poem based on it.
Your updating of the old man (who might even have been W.W. himself) to a modern era is well done. I can readily believe Tom is real. We have a similar character in my locality (though I suspect not a 35 Km walker).
Good work and good luck
Jim
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Many thanks to you Jim. I avoided the more popular of WW's work and found one I liked on the bookshelf at home. Old Tom is actually real. I believe there are a great many 'old Tom's' in towns and villages all over the world. Your comment has set my day off to a good start.
Bob
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'A weekly journey makes a change...'
Nice weekly journey to the town, walking on the road and waiting that someone picks him up.
He is alone and old and he feels so free. It's admirable the way he lives.
Nice picture, nice poetry. -
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Hi Jasmine, Many thanks for reading and commenting on "Old Tom". He representative of the old man or woman who do their own thing regardless of where they live. There is one in every town, especially country towns. I wonder what stories they have tucked away in their memories.
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Great Character
It sounds like this chap has great character. You really described this poem well and it was easy to imagine.
Lilly
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A great many thanks Lilly, he is a character. An independent old man living his life his own way, despite the ravages of age and the lack of money. I admire him.
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I like the poem you wrote here, Bob. This reminds me of an old man i knew in the old days in the home. His was known as old Arthur. He walked passed our school everyday carrying his sack and was always dressed in a long brown coat. I like the style of this piece very much. The first lines talking about the cattle staring and caring nauight was well said. I wish you the very best in the contest.
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Comments and thoughts such as yours are always greatly appreciated. I am trying to write in a different way to my usual style and this contest provided just such a testing ground.
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As I am a very visual person, this has left a nice image. well done
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Thank you my friend, I appreciate your comments. The old man sets out once a week on his 35 kilometre journey. I have picked him up along the road a number of times. He is always grateful for the ride, always courteous, always polite and always independent as he can be. A very old gentleman.
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Great work. I enjoyed this very much.
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Thanks John. I am trying to change my style of writing a bit. Anything can happen.
Constructive comments welcomed.
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Not many souls like that left still walking down the road. An excellent portrayal of tenacity the last sign of human independence. Happy trails Bob.
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Every little town and village has it's own character, someone who stands out simply because he's different. Appreciate your commenting, David.
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I enjoyed the read here.
Nicely done.
All the best in the contest.
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Thanks Anne, glad you enjoyed this one. It quite different from my ususl style.
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wow ... dont think you'd find too many like him then... amazing. nice tribute mate
cheers
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This is a change from my usual stuff. This one is written in the style of William Wordsworth. Old Tom is the subject of the poem. many thanks for your comments, my friend.
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