Spirit rustles the tree tops,
it hovers over
the kingdom clock
and comes to pass
in the faces down below.
Spirit travels
down the cobblestone,
it dances in the culdesac
and ascends
to the steepled church,
where it embraces
the perimeter
of the blessed ones
who's lives are filled
with mirth and bounty.
Spirit smiles through the souls
of the children.
Their innocents and hope
give spirit it's gentle breeze
that moves across their faces
and through their hair
as they laugh and sing
in the golden sun light.
Spirit holds the coming night
with stardust of amber
and white distant glows
that mark the heavenly
frontier of forever.
Spirit descends
with the rising sun,
to kiss the eyes
of all that believe
and keep it alive.
Spirit rustles the tree tops
and comes to pass
in the faces down below.
A contest entry
- Unsung Prewrites! by Justified Inc..
700 points, ended April 2, 68 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 46 of 46
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WOW AMAZIG BRILLIANCE AND SOULFUL EMOTION ROLLED INTO A POEM THAT ENTRANCES MIND AND SOUL VERY INSPIRING GLADi CLICKED ONTHIS ONE..
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Seems worthy of a feature
spirit does just that, too
it envelopes everything that is green and flows through people and life alike.. Cool lit
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...
Lovely in the least...I loved how you described the spirit. This may just be me, but would it have been possible to tell a bit more about what the gentle spirit actually was, or am I delving too deep? (Probably
)
^^
^^
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I love it..... this is always what I envisioned Santa to be when I was little. Somebody who was a spirit like this poem depicts until Christmas, when he could solidify into the chubby red-velvet-bedecked sprite we all know and love. =]
Well written <3
Kelly
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This is beautiful. I was reading through this and could see your vision of spirit... I enjoyed reading it. I was also reminded of a spiritual experience I had about 10 years ago as well.
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this is great. thank you for sharing it with me today. i think it was just what i needed to read. congratulations on the gold trophy. viyanna rosemarie
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:)
oh you!!! you are just brilliant! a mystic traveller perhaps?
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beautiful. siempre.
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Your words always make me shake my head in wonder at how you wrap your thoughts around such beautiful images and ideas. This brought tears to my eyes.....
Love,
Stacy
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Wonderful write, as always. You never disappoint.
You have such a beautiful way of using words.
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In my time as a light tech, I learned that man cannot reproduce every shade of amber present in sunlight in a sustainable form; just like the spirit, which can also not be reproduced by man's power. Today man tries to manipulate the weather, the wind and the earth, and will one day pay for such folly. We can tinker all the proverbial day, but do not add to the balance and beauty already present in the universe, at least in those avenues. This, to me, embodies Spinoza's view of spirit. I love this. SO deeply spiritual and touching. How beautifully humbling, how awesomely wonderful, to be a member of the human race. This reproduces perfect shades of amber.
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this is beautiful, of course ... I really love the flow of this one.. It seems so natural and really... like the wind.... What a wonderful read...
Beautiful really... Just beautiful... -
Gentle and exquisite. This is a refreshing piece of work. I'm not much for inspirational poetry, and you know that, but your sensory imagery here is exquisite. As for the emotion, it's somewhere I dare not venture, but it is superb!!
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wow
this is very peaceful and serene. i love that it ends where it began and the lines lose no juice in the inbetween. spirit does do all these things and this is a lovely way to articulate that. your words always sing to me and this is no different.
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Liam! This is absolutely beautiful! This is quite magical to read! I love it all, but this part is my particular favorite,
"Spirit descends
with the rising sun,
to kiss the eyes
of all that believe
and keep it alive."
I am so glad I chose this poem of yours to read this night! Pam
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Oh my friend...so glad you got a GOLD for this...It is so deserving...Such a warm feeling as one reads..The Holy Spirit is settling on all situations you mention here.... A glorious write...BOOKMARKING! write!!!!!
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WOW!
So beautiful! for the Spirit feels and understands the life that lies below...from the sweet warmth of the moon's glow, a soft kiss upon the cheek, those that do believe shall always see the love that lives within the Spirit that watches over you and me
im touched dear Brother Well worth the GOLD
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I love the imagery in this poem. Not at all my style, but you made it your own, and I enjoyed it. One comment though: in the 3rd stanza, 'innocence', not innocents. Unless you are talking about individual innocent people. Either works, but I think you want the former. Overall, great write!
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Much emjoyed. I like the metophors.
Mark
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Amazing!
This is truly an amazing write! I could sense the mystery and the movement of the Spirit! Wow! I am so moved by this astounding write! Very well written and moving!
Thank you so much for entering this and the way you have put this together is simply beautiful!
Elegantly spoken when read aloud as well!
I loved it!
Bravo!
Justified Inc.
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Relaxing and calm, with wonderful imagery. Thouroughly enjoyed this. I love the tranquility. Makes me sleepy. In a good way.
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a very beautiful poem
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!!
cool -
I wish I felt such unconditional faith and protection- something needed much of late. However, you captured your own spirituality emaquately. I found myslef trying not to read ahead. Beautiful.
Rae
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i enjoyed the peaceful imagery and the circular nature of this spiritual poem.
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Great visual imagery, I could picture the landscapes. Nice job.
I also appreciate the effective use of sound imagery, "Spirit rustles the tree tops".
The reference to the children and innocence added something to the poem. -
ilike
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This is beautiful and interesting and really fantastic, honestly. Great write.
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Beautiful poem. Quite long, but it really gripped my attention. Vocab and theme are fabulous and original, and it flows really well! One mistake you have made though is:
who's [[life's]] are filled
'Life's' is incorrect grammar - you should put 'lives'.
Sorry! I'm being snobby again!
*bangs head on desk* Wonderful poem!
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I really enjoyed reading this poem. it is very heartfelt and the use of imagry is great. Nicely done.
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Beautiful ... with each word the reader can feel the thought ..... as I was moving forward with it every next word was a step towards the tree top.
Lovely write my friend..
again ..
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what a beautifull peice this is lowell, great usage of words with so much warmth and feeling.
just beautifull x x x
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Blessed be the spirit. The alpha and omega, the beginning and the end. Wonderful poem Poe, very meaningful and not only kisses the eyes of those who read, but also the ears when read aloud. Powerful, and very well written. Needs no explanation. Loved it!
Bless you my friend,
Ron
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LOVED THIS~
Without a doubt brother, this is my favorite poem by you...A beautiful poem...
I've often sat and thought similar thoughts, watching, and appreciating.
"Spirit descends
with the rising sun,
to kiss the eyes
of all that believe
and keep it alive."
The imagery throughout the poem was so crisp and clear, but then you get this sort of abstract stanza in the end, followed by a perfectly flowing ending...The stanza beginning with Spirit descends with the rising sun...The vision that the Spirit comes from beyond the sun, that it's that much bigger.
I loved it...Absolutely my favorite...I can't say it enough brother...
BRANDON
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Interesting and very calming. I like it.
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We all need such a spirit.
This is filled with beautiful warm human diction.
The little extra we all need to feed the human hope is all described, love the little bit of politics.
to the steepled church,
where it embarrasses
the perimeter
of the blessed ones
who's life's are filled
with mirth and bounty.
The language is straight forwardly driven, and is a tapestry of colour, enchanted by.
Spirit smiles through the faces
of the children.
Their innocents and hope
give spirit it's gentle breeze
that moves across their faces
and through their hair
as they laugh and sing
in the golden sun light.
You attach the infectious spirit within the very active childrens spirit, with wondrous words.
The whole a joy; many thanks.
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Second read
I decided to read this one again after I saw it in shameless. It was worth it and maybe I understood where you were coming from a bit more this time. -
Beautiful
I especially liked the first line and this line:
Spirit descends
with the rising sun,
to kiss the eyes
of all that believe
and keep it alive.
So beautiful. I am a believer! Kiss my eyes dear poe and set my spirit free so it will know no chains or keepers of misery.
Another masterpiece in the bag baby, no sweat for you mr poe.
See you in outter space
Jen
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Made me feel at home
It sounds like a good description of a vivid out of body experience to me. Was this your intention? I'm not sure but that is how I related to it. Spirit travels down the cobblestone, it dances in the culdesac and ascends to the steepled church. This could be an accurate description of where I live and was my favourite part of the poem. Great stuff as usual. Jimmy
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Ahhh make me take a deep breath!
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I love the soft and gentle feel of this, the tribute to all the senses and the lovely tone. I like how you repeat the first verse at the end, very nice. Thank you for sharing this.
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How wonderful, it was like following through an exhibit. This was a gallery of so many beautiful images. It also felt like it had a dance and a song. This is a very gentle and lovely poem.
Síochán leat
~Mairéad~
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was'nt entirely sure of its meaning but it seemed like a journey of something and as it travels overlooking it was russtling like a wind with eyes
it was soft flow with a warm glow to it
well done
white
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This is beautiful. I was just writing about the spirit this morning....in reference to meditation and such- This is absolutely full of life... of you. I love it...
"where it embarrasses the perimeter
of the blessed ones
who's life's are filled
with mirth and bounty."
this is a great stanza- powerful!
"Their innocence* and hope
give spirit it's gentle breeze
that moves across their faces
and through their hair
as they laugh and sing"
delicately glows with life...
"Spirit holds the coming night
with stardust of amber
and white distant glows
that mark the heavenly frontier
of forever."
i love the passionate words here....
"Spirit descends
with the rising sun,
to kiss the eyes
of all that believe
and keep it alive."
This stanza gave me chills!
And as always from you, a great, powerful, stunning ending by repeating part of the first stanza! I love it! My new favorite!!! For now.....
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First and last stanza - first lines need "rustles" not "russells", apart from that very nice indeed. Great emotion here. Loved it.
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how dreamy this is each and every stanza is full of beautiful images like the winds breath breathing seductively upon my neck
a much needed release for me
"spirit descends
with the rising sun"
a solitude of light
"kisses the eyes"
beautiful metaphor
flows well and reads even better
abigail
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