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The Angel and the Demon

pretty little angel
flying high above
glorfying justice
mercy and all love

ugly little demon
given his black fate
cursing love and happiness
spreading scorn and hate

little do we know of him;
his life before disaster
before he sold his precious soul
because of his dear master

his master was so beautiful
and he loved her so,
but she was dying from disease
he wouldnt let her go

she promised that she'd love him
if he gave to her his life
then he was killed;stabbed in the back
with a glistening knife

now we know the demon's fate
left without a soul
to the devil's house he went
working always for his goal

to get back his spirit
so they may decree
at the gates of heaven, high and strong
if he will ever go free
-----------
little angel
flying high
what about your history
you virtuously deny?

you were human once as well
shy girl in her home
watching Mother steal the love
of he must now roam

you warned the man,
he didn't hear
he loved that fiend
who held him near

she held him tight
and lied to him
and had him killed
on a whim

you ran away,
now didn't you?
from she who can't be named

you hadn't known
how could you have?
the evil she had sown

you tried to love
another man,
yet always longed for HIM

the one who sparked
your care and love
the one you didn't win.

a long and fruitful life you had
but when your time had come
you went gladly, ready for
the man who left you glum

you begged a stay
here on earth
to search for your lost love

whether near
or far away
he'll be found,
below or high above

earth was searched,
and heaven well
the last comes nearer:hell
----------
the angel and the demon meet
looking into eyes
one firey and far away
the other, kind and wise

beyond the faces
misleading though they be
you look into each other's hearts
and see your soul, maybe.

is this where it has been hid
all these years gone past
an innocent, a girl so young,
who'd given warning past?

the love appears
and softly grows
moving where it must
affecting head and heart and brain
affecting pain and lust

the trees watched slowly
seeing all
and waved a message to the stars:

two unknown lovers, in disguise
we pity them, please ask the sun
if we can make them ours?

the features faded
til truth was left
they gazed at their pure forms.

"You're beautiful" he commented
staring at her face
"No, you are," she said blushing,
but straightened in her place

"It doesn't matter," she proclaimed
standing proud and tall
"The outside doesn't matter,
The inside holds it all."

"It holds the love
the happiness
I saw you through that face
of ugliness, deformity
your heart shone through
though it hardly left a trace."

he held her arms, wondering
her skin seemed oh-so clear
fading, almost, as if
she was 'bout to dissapear

she noticed, stepped away from him
"You're fading!" she exclaimed
"They must be taking us back home"

"Where would that be?" he replied
his face falling far down
"Back to hell, where I have stayed,
looking for what I've found?"

"No, back to heaven we must go,
to inform them of my find
they'll be so pleased, and we will stay
forever, out of mind."

The trees behind them rustled
a voice from them intoned
"Neither will you go to them
too long you both have roamed"

"It is your time
to stay on Earth
living together till your end
When fairly judjed you will be
by a loving friend"

They acknowledge
this sudden fact
are given their new forms

Many years pass
And in the clearing
two trees stand close;entwined

their fate connected
in the end
in body, heart and mind

A contest entry

Please comment! It means a lot to me!

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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • cg-frogz
    2 days ago
    Edit | Reply
    good job. nice imagery.
    cg-frogz


  • Captain Amber SL
    April 10, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful, with a lot of imagery in it. Also, I like the length; not many people are brave enough to write such a long poem. I like some of the rhyming here as well... it all fit together quite nicely.

    One criticism I have here, though, is to watch your spelling and grammar, it's a little wrong in some places. A minor fault, but one that could be easily remedied by a spellchecker or something similar.

    I wish you the best of luck, and keep writing and improving your poetry. ^__^

    Aeris Silverlight


  • Xx.Toxic.xX
    April 5, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    wow. whatever place you wanted on my a.p. family is yours. for sure. this completely blew me away.


  • DarkShard
    March 30, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    awww.
    this is a wild poem so after much thought nd reading i am going to offer you a wild card.
    the image was so pure and beautiful that the mistakes and inperfections that normally would stain a grest poem have been overlooked. i will go through you withthem tommorrow in depth if you like to help you improve for your 2nd round poem, which i will be looking forward to. please try you r very best. and more importantly have fun.

    • Dreaming.of.reality
      March 31, 2009
      Edit | Reply
      thank you! I would like that help, though...


      • DarkShard
        March 31, 2009
        Edit | Reply
        ah yes your poem was cool, neeed a little tlc but ovral your ideas and imagery was super cool. here is my email, we shall go through you rpoem with a fine tooth comb and highlight things you could do for future poems that could wow and astound people even more.
        DarkShard@hotmail.co.uk
        contact me when your ready. I am online all day and writing an essay in the same breath.


  • Viyanna Rosemarie silver member
    March 27, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    thank you very much for this entry. the lines are not an issue in this contest. i wish you well. viyanna rosemarie


  • Bean Sidhe silver member
    March 22, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    This was extensively long and I felt like parts of it could have been easily condensed without losing any of the content. I also noticed several spelling and / or grammatical errors, so I would think about going over it with a fine toothed comb and shaking those out.

    The story itself is a lovely one and I give credit where due for keeping your reader's attention, the length of the poem notwithstanding. For the ripe young age of 14, I imagine you have quite a future in narrative poetry!

    So, thank you for your entry and good luck in the contest!

    - Beán Sidħe


  • Paloszoo gold member
    March 22, 2009

    Edit | Reply
    This is a little long for my taste, but the content was superb! Nicely done. Thanks for entering my contest! Good luck! I'm honored to have you show your work here!


  • Strawberry Wolf
    March 5, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    wow... nice work!


  • 2lullabyhaven
    March 2, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    Mismatched love, wow, thanks for your entry and good luck

  • LonelyWolf Tasagka
    February 22, 2009
    Edit | Reply
    Quite Long and it was different.
    Good Luck!

1 - 13 of 13