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My Gift to You

I've had enough
I can't take it anymore
I've tried to change
Tried my absolute hardest
But nothing I do
Is ever good enough

Home isn't welcoming anymore
What were once hugs
Are now painful hits
Slaps, kicks, punches
That I probably deserve

I failed my math test
  SLAP!!
Forgot to take out the trash
...Whack!
Didn't have dinner started when she came home
PUNCH

My face is stained red
And I'm aching everywhere
She leaves me lying on the floor
In front of the kitchen sink
Fleeing to the bars she yearns for

Pulling myself to my feet
I spot the blade on the counter
And grab it by the long handle

I stab it into the wooden table
Dragging it across the surface
Writing what I know
So she'll see it when she returns

Carving the table rather viciously
Tears and blood both drip from my face
Splattering the words below
Embedding into the lacerations
And darkening my 'voice'

Taking the blade again in my shaking hand
It reaches the side of my throat
And penetrates my bruised and battered skin
Sliding from one side to the other
Slowly, like a friend brushing away unwanted dirt

A warm, sticky sensation runs over my body
As the reddened blade falls
Next to me on the floor
Everything is black and nonexistent within seconds
...A welcome release from this life




Her return is calmer than previous ones
Searching for me around the house
Screams of horror escape her mouth
At the sight of my body
And the pool of cold blood on the tiles

The table catches her eye
And she reads the message
Carved into it

              "happy birthday mom
                I know this is
                what you wanted"

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • dutch2lips gold member
    August 4
    Edit | Reply
    a poem filled to the brim with pain
    thank you for entering


  • My Last Breath.x
    May 27
    Edit | Reply

    Judge's Verdict.

    This poem sounded like it was written while you were very very angry, and your mind wasn't very clear (not because of the topic, but how the words came out). It looks as if the more you wrote the clearer your head became.

    I rather like the idea of carving the suicide note into the table; I don't think I've read that in a poem before.


  • ShadowStalker
    May 3
    Edit | Reply
    Ugh, this was a little disturbing. More than emotional, I wanted to stop the person from actually trying to commit suicide! Best of luck in the contest, you've certainly raised the bar for the rest of us! And to think Mother's Day is coming soon. . . .let me know if you need to talk (LOL)

    Schmitty


  • Jazzlyn
    May 2

    Edit | Reply
    ... wow so much pain and agony... i felt the beatings and i felt the blade run across my throat.. very good but please put your name in the AN and have it spaced


  • Green Manalishi gold member
    April 22

    Edit | Reply
    Good job helping someone to kill themself, perhaps someone wresting with the temptation will find encouragement to quit, and choose to lose with your help. Way to go, hero.


  • xxNickxx
    April 21
    Edit | Reply
    I see finalist in the near future


  • xxFallen Dreamsxx
    April 21

    Edit | Reply
    Oh my god....
    Option 1? You left me breath-less, an empty sensation in my stomach...

    this poem is so... Horrifying.

    thank you for entering, and good luck to you

  • sunsunny3235
    April 20
    Edit | Reply
    this is inappropriate and a tinge violent I can't have this sorry

  • Hui Etyud
    April 13
    Edit | Reply
    ...Jesus...that's badass stuff. I died a little on the inside. Lol.


  • HereComesTheSun
    April 11

    Edit | Reply
    wow this had so much emotion and you portrayed this heartbreaking even quite well.
    thanks for entering


  • Shaded DevilFox gold member
    April 6

    Edit | Reply

    wow...

    Speechless... Ithis is...wow... holycrap...
    "like a friend brushing away unwanted dirt"
    that part caught me, it said to me that death was welcome to the character. Which is understandable in a way after what shed been through, you captured this scene very well!!! kudos!!!


  • stargardt13
    February 24
    Edit | Reply
    Wow this was very deep! I was astounded at the ending! I loved it so much! I feel that way so much. And i know many people who have abusive parents. Its a very terrible thing to live through. Thank you for sharing this poem with me and entering it into my contest. Best of luck


  • lowercase prelude gold member
    February 22

    Edit | Reply
    wow
    this is deeply emotional and quite dark
    you have captured the intensity of the situation very well

    great work


  • Walls-within
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    This was very sad, and very very dark. Please add something to your AN please. Go over the rules again if you have any questions...best of luck.

1 - 14 of 14