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Crush

She hung up the phone and felt a rush inside of her
Could he actually feel the same way that she does?
It's all too much to handle; the possibility of happiness
Could it be true love? Or is it just another crush?

Every time he glances her way her breath catches in her throat
The truth comes like a wrecking ball as they try to run away from it
Each day it crosses her mind of if they're more than just friends
Will he take the chance? Can they last forever?

What crush is budding between them won't ever go away
He holds back and tries walking away from her and everything
Her heart is captured, his is hypnotized by her in general
Their feelings for each other getting stronger each day....




Author notes

^And some girls want to read their crushes' minds to k.n.o.w. what they are thinking and how they feel.

xangelofxdarknessx

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 25 of 25

  • dutch2lips gold member
    July 11

    Edit | Reply
    i sometimes feel, when i read your work, that i want more details, your writing intrigues me, maybe try short stories? thank you for entering


  • Leance
    July 11

    Edit | Reply

    I would like to thank you for taking the time to view and enter my contest.
    Contests here on Allpoetry are a lot of fun and I hope that everyone enjoys them.
    I will soon be posting a contest for BRONZE only poems. I do hope you will consider entering.

    If you are dreaming, you should be writing
    For dreams are words we should share
    Sharing makes us all stronger
    So thank you for sharing your dreams and words with me

    Judging:

    Wow, this has been placed in a lot of contests. A very simple love story. It is also difficult to k.n.o.w what someone is thinking. Just when we think we have figured it out, we find out we are wrong.

    Title: I realize this is a crush or possiblie a CRUSH. However, I think another title would do it so much more justice.

    Content: The content fit the poem yet it wasn't full of substantial information so you did well capturing what was in the poem.

    Imagery: You had some imagery that allowed the reader to step into the write and utilize senses to feel the poem. A little more added would certainly not hurt it.

    Grammar: The grammar wasn't horrid however, it could be improved especially with the amount of other contests this is entered in.

    Flow: The flow was quite consistent and was relatively easy to follow.

    Thanks again for entering.
    Leance
    A goal is a dream with a deadline.
    -Napolean Hill-65


  • rainbows. gold member
    July 7

    Edit | Reply
    I think this could have been better, more imagery and metaphor. But overall, very nice poem. I love what you did with your prompt. Thank-you for entering this piece into my contest.


  • Miss Faerie Greeters member
    July 1

    Edit | Reply

    Thank you for your entry

    I love that this is different from the usual "i like this boy" poem. It shows how you can feel (breath catching) and then the mere thought that this might last... words are so well chosen here, and it's easy to see the emotion behind them.

    Thank you for entering my contest and good luck
    Shari


  • Salty Hibiscus gold member
    June 5
    Edit | Reply
    we faced many questions ourselves everyday like that. i relate to it.


  • xXGoddessofPainXx
    April 22

    Edit | Reply
    I think it's a good poem I really and truly enjoy it. It's not too long and yet not too short just right. It talks about love which is a wonderful thing indeed


  • Electric Sunrise gold member
    April 2

    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for the entry here, apologies regarding the delay on the judgement

    Great write here, very clever, descriptive, and most likely something an awful lot of people will be able to identify with, thanks for the entry and best of luck in the contest


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    March 24

    Edit | Reply
    Very sweet write
    I remember the days of when I had a crush on someone and how it made me feel
    Precious
    Thank you for sharing and for being part of this contest


  • honey bear
    March 17

    Edit | Reply
    thank you for entering and good luck in the contest wit hthis very interesting peice


  • Antebellum
    March 12
    Edit | Reply
    great write
    good luck


  • LoveNeverDies.
    March 4

    Edit | Reply
    "Her heart is captured, his is hypnotized by her in general
    Their feelings for each other getting stronger each day...."

    This is a good write, although you could emphasise
    it abit more,

    Overall i enjoyed reading it,

    Thankyou for entering LoveNeverDies,

    Goodluck

    (:


  • Crazy9Piano8Freak
    February 23

    Edit | Reply
    Definately a great way to sum up and the song and define what exactly a crush is. I've felt this way a few times... It's a definate thrill and feels wonderful... at first and then when it goes away you feel pretty much empty. Great job! Thanks and good luck!


  • Ryan79
    February 21

    Edit | Reply
    I've felt this way before. I hope that it is true. I've wondered this many times. It always hurts to be let down and have your heart broken.


  • Kwalk
    February 18

    Edit | Reply
    awww, i like it. it reminds me of something. lol. it's very good. keep it up.

1 - 25 of 25