i am pretend.
watch the man in the flannel
suit jacket pour
himself over you like
syrup and make moves
with his sausage fingers.
smoke billows out our mouths
and we walk with clasped hands across a crowded
sidestreet full of unborn
and night men.
you are my pitcher.
fill me up and let me
flow like water to your spine.
grip me close to chests
and open windows.
i will not squirm,
my thighs will part
like the red sea and
i will kiss your
toes and call you heaven.
fold me up and label me
as "one" marked for delivery(UPS)
i will unite with you and crinkle
crinkle crinkle until i feel pain
and release my all to you.
self-imposed hatred,
take my eyes and watch me
burn through candle light.
i will kiss your mouth,
oh that sweet sweet tomb,
and cup you to my ribs,
and worship you with my hands.
i will cradle you in myself and
let you be my savior.
i will slasp you to my inside
walls and make you promise,
"always, always."
forever my love,
for always.
Author notes
muffins.
p.s. the midwest love affair=motion city soundtrack©. tyy.<3
i am a monotony
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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good imagry!
your a really talented writer, very good use of words!
try and expand on your themes though, you don't have to talk about just love with skills like yours!
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haha i am so sorry. idn, i was reading some other story at the time and just got a creepy vibe. it's a descriptive poem, and it's pretty good... sorry again.
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you are my pitcher fill me up and let me flow, loved it and fold me up and lael me. Them two lines jumped out at me. WAS a pleasure to read.
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very cleverly done- i like it, oh the tone is wonderful [from my perspective-i tend to like this stuff]
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very distrubing but i like it... interesting write.. keep going!
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At first (after reading your note) I was thrown off by "pour/himself over you like/syrup and make moves/with his sausage fingers." and I was thinking of a sausage McMuffin, but then the rest of the poem was definitely not about eating and very disturbing. Good write though, just confused me.
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This poem has a quality that disturbed me, i'm not sure if that's what you were going for or not but it made me feel uneasy.
One spelling error that you might want to fix "i will slasp you to my inside".
Really good write. Thanks for sharing
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it was supposed to be disturbing
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that is the complete vibe i got, and it frightened me. midway through i thought boyfriend maybe? idn. it was a really good poem, if that's any consolation after my previous rudeness.
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please tell me this is not about your father?
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haha no worries, i re-read it and i could understand that
thank you for commenting! -
um, no?!
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