Self-Destructive

The scenes outside your empty room
Have dimmed, lost all their luster
To resist that euphoric poison
Takes all the conscience you can muster

While the odds scoff at your efforts
Because they know it won't be long
Until you must appease your demons
From resignation, the flow is drawn

Drip,drip, it is pooling below
Drowning your will to escape
This routine that's slowly eating
The life you desperately wish to save

But that precious paint can color again
The blank surroundings that have no sheen
The cold statues are now animated
Your life welcomes reintroduced meaning

Yet when all is thrust into grey again
You destroy more than you'll ever gain
To have that momentary piece of mind
You play your self-destructive game

You're playing tag with the phantoms
Of a happy, wholesome existence
It's just they play the game so well
Deserting you is their only mission

You wish to taste the rain again
But the secrets have stolen your tongue
Long sleeves smother words you dare not say
Then drag you back to your torturous fun

A rip for misdemeanors
A gash for every fault
A burn for each day wasted
A tear for all that's lost

Offer up the hefty toll
To survive another day
But is the comfort that follows
Really worth the price you pay?

The crow within the dank basement
Remains your solitary friend
He caws his lullaby in hopes
Of putting your razor to bed

You crane your bruised neck and listen
For a note that holds a reason
To cease your destructive ritual
But your hand finds none; another cut