Never Give Up On Always

Trust and comfort
Pasta warm off the Oven
The predictable warmth of a blanket
Wrapped around my body at 3am and again at 8
Friendship, laughter, and your constant touch

I never expected you to be the guy I wanted to call
The guy who would always listen
But somehow the summer after I turned eighteen, you became that guy
You walked me out to my car after work
You let me cry on your shoulder or over the phone
You even shoveled  off my car after we had broken up
Yet again

People always told me, there was something about us
Something about the way we would act around each other
That just meant something more…
And
I felt the spark that first time you walked into my life
Plastic bags and all
Or when your lips brushed mine, that unanticipated, unruly first kiss
But I don’t think I realized how real that feeling was, until….this weekend.

It wasn’t the fact that you made me dinner
Or the reasons you told me, that you wanted us to work
It wasn’t even the fact that you let us watch the movies I WANTED
Mostly, it was just how everything you had ever said
Came into focus
Came into view

Like every statement, every compliment, every jab
Came down to this one moment
Of the two of us reconciling, falling in love

You told me once that everything, with us would
Eventually,
Down the road,
Work out
That someday I would find out that
You were the guy for me

And well

You were right,
…..the teddy bear
…..the nickel back songs
….that single dance in my room
…..the homecoming weekend and every single solitary conversation we have ever had after that
Have lead me to this conclusion

You have always cared about me, just as much as I cared for you…
…because every time I wanted to call you, you’ve eventually called me back
And every time we got in a fight we eventually figured out a way to forgive each other
And after
All those fourth of July K-I-S-S-I-N-G moments
The words I couldn’t say
All the girlfriends I’ve pissed off
And the boyfriends who wanted to punch you…
All the poems I have left unwritten
And the Reese’s Sundays we’ve devoured
I have realized nothing matters without
You and Me
And our CRAZY, insane, undeniable love…

This weekend I finally understood my own heart….