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almost-poem

 

 


with words like doves
I would’ve broken through
the blue,

 

that blue
of a high blank want,
of a you and an i
in verse forgotten;
would i have voiced the wingspan
of the unspoken
for the release
into understanding,
into light –
lovelier and lighter
than song

but my words sit cluttered
and cold, the coo of their breast
clenched between letter
and line,  

and i

end up with something resembling
almost flight, almost poem










Author notes

"i may as well try and catch the wind..."

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 64 of 64

  • ccawley gold member
    October 27
    Edit | Reply
    This is just brilliant.


  • perfectsunset gold member
    May 29

    Edit | Reply
    Wow "almost flight, almost poem"
    How beautiful and intelligently
    crafted is that? Your mind
    surely works wonders and
    it seems as if your light
    switch in writing is always on,
    for you never cease to
    amaze your readers


  • LadyElbereth
    April 21
    Edit | Reply

    Painfully Sad

    Almost is always so sad no matter the air it arrives on...


    Lady E


    • Nicolette gold member
      April 21
      Edit | Reply
      there is something so very painful about "almost"...yes.
      thank you, Catherine


  • Dalaney gold member
    April 2

    Edit | Reply
    you have such an uncanny way of bringing softness into poetry...no matter the subject, i feel it.  another beautiful write.  love, lane


  • sideways hourglass
    March 22

    Edit | Reply
    This is beautiful. I love the assonance in spots, it gives the poem a little kick and it just flows perfectly.

    "I would’ve broken through
    the blue,



    that blue
    of a high blank want,
    of a you and an i
    in verse forgotten"
    loved that.


  • katelynmcdougall
    March 16

    Edit | Reply
    gorgeous. Simple and stunning.
    Its late so I will have to come back to more of your work, but you are amazing! Love this!


  • AutumnGypsy gold member
    March 14

    Edit | Reply
    This is stunning, really. You capture such softness in heartbreak. I would break bones for a talent like this. The want was palpable here. well done


  • Lyndon gold member
    March 14

    Edit | Reply

    Yes, you are a poet ...

    I mean a poet, not just an allpoetry version!
    This poem is startling because it forces even the most prosaic of minds to think poetic wisdom.
    Thank you very much.








    • Nicolette gold member
      March 14
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you, dear Ron. I haven't been very poetic lately as I've been busy with professional writing and when I get home I'm a bit tired of writing, lol. Reading your comment this morning makes me want to try that thing called poetry again. Thanks again


  • Lyrical Soul silver member
    March 8

    Edit | Reply
    But remember, "almost" is never good enough for you dear friend. "True flight, True poetry" is yours. So is "true" happiness. It is there for you....I promise. (and the poem is beautiful my vriendin )

    Love,
    ~Lyrical


  • Jaden silver member
    March 6
    Edit | Reply
    Neat poem . . . or should I say 'almost poem'?


  • flowingwords
    March 6

    Edit | Reply
    Kinda makes me wanna sigh a bit, not sure why...
    Always a joy reading your work, your words carry so much wisdom and passion...Simply a beautiful almost-poem ....
    ~Kimberly~

  • Virgoan
    March 6

    Edit | Reply
    always a pleasure to read your work my friend. I miss reading your work.

    'Breathless is breathing', all I can say with your work.


    HENSLEY


  • tearyeyedbutterfly
    March 3
    Edit | Reply
    This is brilliant! Nice job!

  • Aries1555
    March 3
    Edit | Reply
    This is amazing . your words touched me . Nicolette ; you are a beautiful writer.


  • marc creamore
    March 3

    Edit | Reply
    Nicolette . . . this has a deep sadness running through it, a beautiful sadness, yet still a sadness. I can almost taste your tears . . .

    Marc


  • just4fun20
    March 3

    Edit | Reply
    very nice awsome flow and it just leaves you thinking after youget done reading it and it just makes you think


  • campanaro silver member
    February 27

    Edit | Reply

    What a lovely write..

    When we are blessed enough to discover
    true wisdom, beauty in the hearts of others
    we should pay attention..
    Your talent is inspiring.

    Love Peace
    campanaro


    • Nicolette gold member
      February 27
      Edit | Reply
      thank you, campanoro....your comments are always special


  • glennwood
    February 27

    Edit | Reply

    Hands down awesome

    I think if I tried to put down how I feel after reading this all i'd be able to write is an almost comment. Absolutley terrific poem, you have a unique artistic voice that really catches me up


  • SabaSophiya
    February 22

    Edit | Reply
    This is beyond beautiful!

    My favorite lines are::::

    but my words sit cluttered
    and cold, the coo of their breast
    clenched between letter
    and line, and i

    end up with something resembling
    almost flight, almost poem


  • thepoetssoul
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    This is a magnificient penning you have written.
    Something about the rhythm and flow that moves me.
    Bob is always writing about the wind, and I think you caught it and took flight
    Brilliant poem, thanks for your entry, be blessed in all you do.

    Tony


  • And Hyetal
    February 20

    Edit | Reply
    I don't know how you do it, but I love what you do. You write so simply but it says so much.

    ~Cassie


  • PrincessShilo
    February 19
    Edit | Reply
    I love this style of poetry. It really speaks to me. So beautiful.


  • kaibab silver member
    February 18

    Edit | Reply
    I think of dylan...saw him last year.. so many of his songs ramble around blowing in the wind about something ...especially love...Don't think twice... its allright...casual...this sounds like that a bit...but clever and lonely for truth to fly...lovely my friend


  • Jersene gold member
    February 18

    Edit | Reply
    'would i have voiced the wingspan
    of the unspoken
    for the release
    of understanding'

    I love those lines. This is beautifully penned, and so full of emotion. Love this


  • Randomly Beautiful
    February 18

    Edit | Reply
    but my words sit cluttered
    and cold, the coo of their breast
    clenched between letter
    and line, and i

    end up with something resembling
    almost flight, almost poem


    How beautiful you weave words together. Never ceases to amaze me.


  • Thomas Scott gold member
    February 17

    Edit | Reply
    This is overwhelming.
    "wingspan of the unspoken"
    Over and over I read this.
    Beautifully audible.
    Good luck in the contest.


  • just rob gold member
    February 17
    Edit | Reply
    there it is


  • le soir
    February 17
    Edit | Reply
    this is lovely.. you always have the perfect metaphors..


  • Sonja
    February 17

    Edit | Reply
    I was already here and I leave myself a time to ponder of it. It is so nice, it is beautiful, but something in your words of "almost-poem" hits me to the core. Don't try to catch the wind. Stay, it will turn itself up to you and will become the soothing breeze...
    ~Sonja~


  • valentina
    February 17

    Edit | Reply
    ooooo
    this is just lovely, seriously.
    it reads just like the wind you mention in your author notes.


  • inder silver member
    February 16

    Edit | Reply

    romancing the almost

    oh what a joy lies in the incompleteness of things...like unrequited love...story left mid way...journey never completed...dream half dreamt..n a poem whose last verse remains tangled at the core of the heart!..between you and i
    very earthy in elements yet in a flight ...


  • misselaineous
    February 16

    Edit | Reply
    this is why i keep coming back
    my own muse has gone on some farflung breeze

    but this is poetry to remind me why i once wrote
    it touches souls


  • natari
    February 16

    Edit | Reply
    i'm reading poems that just tug at the heart strings today.this just echoes around my mind.beautiful poetry written with astuteness.you know love nicolette.

    Helen


  • ariazephyrzoe gold member
    February 16

    Edit | Reply
    of a high blank want,
    of a you and an i

    I love this so much
    simply beautiful
    I have no words
    I can only sigh...and feel this
    if i could call mine an almost-comment


  • tara wilson gold member
    February 16

    Edit | Reply
    i am left with that feeling, that 'almost' feeling...i know this..and how it's presented in your poem is perfect, how the first half is where you want the words to be, into the light, but like they just can't lift up from that place deep inside of you...i soooo know this..!!... and it is sad and frustrating...especially when it's about love....
    your poetry is always so deep. it digs into the deepest part of what makes us human and what we all feel. you continue to amaze me & i want to thank you for writing again..and for writing this, because i enjoy reading you so much....


    tara


  • Grunts Girl gold member
    February 16

    Edit | Reply
    i know this sounds bizzar...
    the coo of their breast--- in my head i made it
    the breasted coo... never mind me lol
    out of everything so cluttered cleverly before it... I was hung up with that line-
    i adored the first section to this... mahhhvelous
    i also wonder with the title you have... can you just end it with
    almost flight... because i said almost poem on my own anyway? because you showed it to me so brilliantly


  • katfair
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    touching as always
    tender and poignant

    I know that cluttered cold too
    and longing for understanding
    AND
    doves
    OH

    may I be bold enough to meet a poem with a poem I love:

    And within me, along
    with the garbage, faces, faces
    and voices, so many
    lives woven into mine,
    such improbable quantities
    of memory; so much already
    forgotten, lost, pruned away—
    yet the doves, the doves!

    —from "Doves" by C. K. Williams


  • CaliOkie silver member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    Almost perfect. The asymptotic curve, we get ever closer to perfection, but it eludes us more as we grow closer. Strangely, we are all born with an innate understanding of perfection and know it when we see it, but it is damned hard to create.

    I love this, particularly the subtle embedded alliteration and syllable stress patterns. This just sounds good when it is spoken.

    Excellent.

    Garrison


  • paulcreates silver member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    oh boy...been there. This usually happens to me when there's an anxiety I have to work through.
    Time to entertain the rest of the senses - maybe get a cup of tea and listen to music a while.
    Take very good care Nicolette.


    Paul


  • Night Hope gold member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply

    This poem...this exquisite, tender, trembling shiver of a poem...breaks my heart into a thousand tiny shards. Yet...your rare, precious, golden doves always lift the pieces right back up into the heavenly light with their beauteous songs, where sorrow cannot touch their sacred rhythms, their sanctuaries of solace I have always, always found.  How lovely you are, even in your mourning song, my beloved Sister. How strong you are, even whilst shedding your silent, silken tears. Vlindertjie


  • arafura gold member
    February 15
    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully and wistfully penned. Bravo!


  • Mari Goes gold member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    I love it how you touch something deep inside of so many of us with your words, like you did to me with this poem.


  • IronIcecream
    February 15
    Edit | Reply

    for the release
    released?

    seems to roll better

  • dx d by me
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    Your poetry seems to come from a place just beyond myvision, making this reader shift their thought and breathe your words, lines, and love....exquisite poetry!

  • aaaaaaaa
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    "that blue
    of a high blank want,
    of a you and an i
    in verse forgotten;"

    ahh this is incredible. i read this over and over. good luck in the contest, i think you'll do well.

  • Rowan gold member
    February 15
    Edit | Reply
    so beautiful Nicolette, I feel the loss and the flutter. *sighs*


  • campanaro silver member
    February 15
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    This was so lovely.
    Thank you..
    Love peace
    campanaro


  • NurseChilly gold member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    only you Nicky, can write such beautiful pain and loss, the tips of wings and the heart in flight
    i feel the breeze and see the eagle fly...
    sigh sigh sigh
    beautimous!!!


  • MJ Donnelly gold member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    "The poetry of a soul, so very old
    Will surely linger in the thoughts of angels
    As they echo through streets of gold."

    This is how your words make me feel Nicky.

    I am in awe.

    With much love,
    Michael.


  • leander Moderators member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    I missed your writes my friend - my activity isn't what it used to be on here either though
    It's nice how you give food for thoughts with your lovely pieces...


  • Peteskid gold member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply

    an almost poem, completely wonderful... beautiful thoughts here ...PK


  • Catie Sheeran gold member
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    omg...what imagery! this is so beautiful...I love it!!!!




  • Cannonsfire
    February 15

    Edit | Reply
    This is breathtakingly gorgeous as always, you could never write an almost poem...you write from your heart dear friend C

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