'Twas dreams of dreadful avarice once led me to this land,
Where the rivers run with platinum and zinc,
And the trees bear fruit of purest gold above the silver sand,
While the sky is, sadly, permanently pink.
So me and Mister Malaprop, my horse of fifteen hands,
Packed up our props and made our journey there,
We had to ask the way in over twenty torrid lands
And soon of misdirections had our share.
I sat me down upon the ground, and then to my surprise,
That trusty horse began to speak to me,
He stared up to the sky, then fixed me right between the eyes,
Quite unusual for a horse, you will agree.
"Oh do not take the jungle road," neighed Mister Malaprop,
"Let's linger by the river for a space,
For I've been trotting faithfully without a single stop,
And my hooves are cracked, my coat a damn disgrace!
Why should an equine thoroughbred be bothered over gold,
Or platinum, or silver, aye, or zinc ?
My teeth, they hurt like merry hell, I'm feeling kind of old
And I guess a river's made to have a drink!"
With that he sat down on the bank, and taking out a cup,
He filled it from the river to the brim,
Added just a touch of sugar, and then began to sup,
While I, struck dumb, just gaped and gazed at him.
Was this the way to treat a chum, a faithful quadruped ?
We'd hiked our way from Shotts to Singapore,
We'd bumbled through Balerno, and bounced on Beachy Head,
And Mister Malaprop was saddle sore.
Well, finally I found my voice, and this is what I said,
As the sun was sinking slowly in the West,
"My Mal (I called him Mal) I must be crazy in the head,
To me you've always been one of the best,
So blast those dreams of avarice, what's money been to me?
True friends are worth much more than bags of brass,
Let's amble slowly backwards till we land in Linden Lea,
And you can chomp and chew the verdant grass."
I swear that every single word I've told to you is true,
While Mal corroborates the tale in full
He wanders now through Linden Lea, beneath a sky of blue,
And smiles at his reflection in the pool!
A contest entry
- Lovely long lines by cricketjeff.
1800 points, ended March 5, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Inspire my soul to write once more by Poetryistherapy.
800 points, ended March 30, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Animal Friends by Himitsu.
550 points, ended May 30, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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What a fantastic tale! Such a simple concept brought about brilliant results. I very much enjoyed your poem and commend your decision to consider Mister Malaprop (though it would be quite a feat not to, him accosting and all). Thank you for your entry.
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Most rhyming poems immeadiately annoy me, but I have to say this was adorable.
Thanks for entering and for following my rules -
I suppose if I were to be a stupidly critical person there may be some bits here I'd argue with, but I'm not!
What a great story, great meter, great rhyme, well just greatness. This contest has attracted the finest on AP on the top of their form, I am deeply honoured, I can't however give 10 golds I'm afraid
Thanks for a superb entry.
Jeff
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I suppose if I were to be a stupidly critical person there may be some bits here I'd argue with, but I'm not!
What a great story, great meter, great rhyme, well just greatness. This contest has attracted the finest on AP on the top of their form, I am deeply honoured, I can't however give 10 golds I'm afraid
Thanks for a superb entry.
Jeff
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Amazing poem full of fine flow and meter and a lovey, lovely read! Her's to Mr Mal!
Good Luck!
Hilly
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Aw Keith, this is terrific! What a great tale (and mane, and withers.) The fourth line kills me! That and 'Mal' corroborating the story! Great stuff here!
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AWESOME!!! That was absolutely marvelous!
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A horse of a different colour, that's for sure! Excellent piece of fun rhyming, amusing and pacy.
Bill
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So far, so good.
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Superb
http://www.tv.com/mister-ed/show/769/summary.html
This is a very fine write, and having a conversation with a horse can be a lot of fun!!! You may be familiar with the line: "A horse is a horse, or course,,unless it's name is Mr Ed".
If not just click on the above link.
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I recall Mr Ed and Wilbur very well. Thanks for reminding me. I don't think I ever remember that horse moving out of his stall. But he was an awfy blether. Cheers!
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Aye, that he was. Hope all is going well for you.
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Excellent
'Tis a very fine write, indeed. Imagery; rhythm and rhyme are just fine. Thanks for sharing this one with us. -
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I'm happy that you liked my verse, my tale of deepest woe,
'Tis dedicated to the equine race
Who very rarely do complain as on the road they go,
I wouldn't like to be there in their place.
So next time that you meet a horse, please stop to have a chat,
You know they like to pass the time of day,
Some words about the length of grass, a talk of this and that,
Before you walk upon your human way.
Best Wishes. K.
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