I watched the end of a Sun-Shower once
and saw the Golden beams reflect off metalic mirrors
that quenched my eyes with warm sensations.
Where Silver beads fall from carpolite skies
and saw chatoyant grains of sand, burst from charcoal tarmac.
Unlike Amazon drums that dance and sing, when great fires burn.
Unlike the Desert Sahara, where parched mouths smile.
Author notes
image credit: good weather, by ad-lib
deviantart
Allow me to explain my poem. I was taken with the image and the combined prompt of the title Sun-Showers and decided to combine their value with gold and silver, which is a contradiction to a material world that takes the weather for graunted. Where as the raining amazon welcoming the sun as they play music and dance around fires to the opther extreame where a burning desert craves for the quenching sensation of rain.
the poem argues how lucky we are to recieve a balance of both.
and so despite the fact that I had to use some form of image to describe the weather, I none the less tried to give a much deeper meaning to my poem.
thankyou for reading.
please leave a thoughtful comment.
A contest entry
- weathering the elements by Jersene.
2100 points, ended February 18, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
what do you think?
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
-
Beautiful imagery in this. I like that you took what most take for granted, and compared it to what most desire most.
(uh I cant say Awesome, but it is.
)
Joe
-
a good poem and i loved the delicate intricate language used here, like an offering to a god. perhaps that is what it is, an offering to nature. the weather, do you know that english people speak about the weather more than any other thing! really, i am not joking, we tend to speak of it all the ime in passing. rain is my favourite - i just love the rain. i love watching it - hearing it pound. good job i live in a rainy city then
-
Interesting take on the prompt. I like how you used the picture, with the prompt of sunshower and made it deep and meaningful. I must admit, I found the background a little distracting...something I must remember for future contests, lol. Still this is well written. The last two lines are my favourite. Thanks so much for your entry
-
this was truly beautiful. The depth of your writing is definitely immeasurable. Your poem created beautiful images, and the message benind it is so clear and true.
thank you for sharing your words with us.
Keep writing,
Holly. -
Beautiful
This was exceptional..
Thank you for your beautiful poem.
Love peace,
campanaro
-
Great write! I love it. I love your word choice too.
"I watched the end of a Sun-Shower once
and saw the Golden beams reflect off metalic mirrors
that quenched my eyes with warm sensations.
Where Silver beads fall from carpolite skies
and saw chatoyant grains of sand, burst from charcoal tarmac."
Keep writing.
-
Wow reading through your poem and the explanation tells me nothing but the esthetics wordsand the beauty of the mind of good poets like u. Great imageries and allusions.
Amazing write!
-
Unlike Amazon drums that dance and sing, when great fires burn.
Unlike the Desert Saharah, where parched mouths smile.
I liked it very much and hope you continue to write these kinds of things. the poem all flowed together and just made sense. i hope others have the chance to see your work as i did
blessed be
-
I think that you hit the spot with this write.. I love how you combined something that in a way is so opposite yet it blended so well! thanks much for sharing! best of luck in the contest.
Angel
-
I loved the metaphors in this, it was like I could see the precious metals driping throughout the poem. It was a beautiful write bursting with imagery, and I agree with you completely on the matter you're trying to explain.
-
Beautiful piece. you did very well conveying your message.
Thank you for sharing this with everyone!
-
good =]
-
this is a beautiful write from you. i think Saharah is spelled Sahara though. i could be wrong but i've never seen it with an h on the end. i wish you the best of luck in this contest that you have entered. viyanna rosemarie
-
i really like this, and how you ended it was aweosmely amazing. hehe..good luck
Stephanie ♥
-
I really like this!! the message is really good and the words you chose are so descriptive
-
The background really compliments this.
My favorite line "quenched my eyes with warm sensations"
Adding your comment:
1 - 16 of 16
