There are signs warning me away;
Lisa looks at me with narrowed eyes
the fragrant creams on the tips of her fingers,
unguents to chase the years away.
When I close my eyes
the words dance and spin on Hero's axe
the brook is bright and clean
and the nymphs laugh
at the thought of my unclean acts.
There are puppies too
laughter just beyond my field of view,
paths to secret places
where fairies light the buttercups
in sparkling display and watch them float away--
Such as these have watched the years,
and laughed at our dismay,
Careworn, serious in our intent
plodding on our track with trowel
content with each succeeding trial.
Lisa empties out her lungs at me,
frightened, I suppose,
that the brook is always new,
even in the Winter,
when it froze.
Author notes
Part 2; On Love.
Written February 21st, 2004
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1 - 35 of 35
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Long but well worth the read. Very lovely write and thanks for sharing!!!
Katie
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A wonderful poem about meeting the challenges of living a holsom life. We all fail at some point in our lives. We must learn and go on to live a better life. Wonderful poem. Thank you for sharing. Sandy
Edited on Aug 19, 6:01 because ''. -
Absolutely stunning.
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Wow this is an excellent poem and i think you have a great talent of putting imagery in your lines so vivid and treansparent yet with so many hidden meanings ..
There are puppies too
laughter just beyond my field of view,
paths to secret places
now this evokes so many feelings in a person your method of presentation and depiction is excellent ..puppies may be somebodys' foelorn memories and laughter the wishes of downtrodden and depressed .. well done and do keep it up -
It has a little house on the prairie feel to I like it. I think you did a great job writing this.It is so refreshing to read a poem that makes you feel like your in the olden days. I thank you for sharing this poem with me. The imagery is awesome I can almost see this taking place just outside my window. Again thank you for sharing .And good luck in all you do.
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Lovely lovely words. I don't remember having read any of your poetry before, but I can imagine that you must have quite the list of people with you on their favorites. There's such solid imagery through each stanza and a lovely flow throughout the entire piece.
Nicely done! -
Keep writing
And our soul is renewed with the reading of a great write.
Thank you for sharing this,
Pure Thought -
The Artist Formerly Known as Worm used to write the best comments didn't he? I do miss him.
A touch twee said Philogos and I love it. Shall be using it soon.
This was I think the second poem I read of yours funny, I was at my friend Jean's house last night and I'm a bit wine-headed this morning (just a follow-up to my first comment up there). I could use a dunk in the Brook - that clear cool cleansing water. Baptismal even.
Lighting the buttercups is delicious. I hope you don't quit.
Lisa
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A nice poem dear friend.
Shahrzad
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I assume that this brook is Heraclitus' changing river. The contrast between human aging and the cycles of nature is very effective - even the futility of the deep freeze. I thought the border was a touch twee myself...
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Take a bow son, take a bow
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Very cute and the border was perfect for it. Flow was good, keep up the great work.
Katie
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very nice. the flow was nice and your choice of words sounded great. thanks for sharing. good luck. i liked it very much. best of wishes to you. thanks. peace.
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I like this poem very much. I like the majestic feel to your poem and I like the feeling of things new and reborn. Nice write I enjoyed it. Write on.
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You've been here on this site a long time - I too know not what this is about - must have been for a contest at one time. Written well, interesting conclusion,
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interesting
a nice little fairy tale, very interesting read. -
sweet, i have no idea who this is about, but i like it.
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The depth of this is sensed before it is understood, and I find myself thinking about Lisa and trying to wrap my mind around the significance of that: is this some goddess, child, symbol of infancy, innocense? The frozen water stanza is super powerful, with the idea of newness not always being good, though in this context, maybe just neutral. Change for change's sake.
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Very nice poem- you used good words to describe the scenes of your life (or the character's life, depending on the view). Well written and 'love'ly.
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yup. -
this is just so cute and adorabubble..little puppies and fairies laughing at us...it kind of makes you feel safe..its beautifully big and gorgeous
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I find the words of this poem to be playful, moving toward rhyme ever, but free enough to flow along at such a lazy pace that even winter when it froze can not take from the moments of this. A great poem, beginning to end...
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This poem is quite original, lyrical...it just leaves me without thoughts actually...is that a good thing I wonder. Thanks, Maria
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Nice blend of naughty with some very sweet images...makes for an interesting combination. But silly me...when i saw your reference to puppies i was thinking of ....ummmm...nevermind. And let's not even get started on people like Des coming in through your back door...lol. Sure wish i could speak Luten-ese...this would sound so much funnier! lol
UB
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Ah, bless Myra for giving a new word to the language: Lutish indeed. Of course my word was neo-post-Luteanism, pedantic and quite without style. Of course, your Brook overflows with Style, that marvellous commodity without which Vivaldi might have written 400 concertos instead of the same one 400 times.
Also enchanted by the word "unguents", which you must have found on page 347 of your well-thumbed Thesaurus, between Umbilicus and Urwin.
Lovely pome.
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such beautiful reminiscence in this poem. bright clean brook, puppies, paths to secret places where fairies light the buttercups. I've been there, seen these places, miss them. thanks for taking me back for a visit.
joyously delightful poem, lute!
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Lurve is in the air.....
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mostexcellent
The warning signs are always there Lutie but it doesn't mean you have to listen to them then again maybe it does, who knows
I think the second stanza is the one that spoke to me especially "the words dance and spin on Hero's axe" hero's axe is very cool. This is gorgeous and yep I agree wit dem folks up der, berry Lutish.
Desiree
I see dis is promo'd so glad I came in de back door
Edited on Feb 21, 10:19 because ''. -
I hate to see lute yelled at.... but I can't say anything bad about her.... she is every woman.
This poem touched my piscean heart with all the fairies and nymphs.. You are pure genius with your words poet. -
This was a nice poem. I really liked it. You have a really good way with words. I only wish my words could come out like this hehe. But anywho..Great write!
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oh my. i'm hungover. but these words are lush to my head despite the fog. oh. the talk of nymphs and buttercups. then a jump to careworn and plodding with trowels. heady swings. my dictionary does not have "lutish" defined. i'll have to do more research. Well, it appears you let Lisa in since last i stopped at your poem house. maybe all that yelling is a necessary catharsis? what did you say back? perhaps that is part 3. of course, i always care who Lisa is. but that is just a personal thing.
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I am going to have to come back and read this poemsome more. But I agree the poem is wonderful. I also agree that it is just soooooooooo Lutish!
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Who cares who Lisa is??
when love is all around and MrL is playing love's sweet refrain from his ever open heart.. wonderful play on words here.. liked it alot
~GILL~xxx -
When do we get parts 3 through to 103? Does Lute not know we can never get enough of his words regarding love?
I am going to have to read this some more. Once or twice or three times now is just still not enough.
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Masterful
Please dearest Lute, excuse my deliberate act of humour, but I cannot become serious today ... Not before I have done my summersault exercises ... Firstly, I need a take-off, secondly a swift, well-rounded jump, thirdly a perfect and agile landing and then, of course, fourthly, a neat finish-off ... and ... there:
Now what does this have to do with your poem? Well, Lute mine, your poem is just as agile as any acrobatic movement. I loved this poem. I will not say one word about Lisa, not one word about this obstinate Lisa, not one single word about this everpresent Lisa. I will not say a word. I will just ignore Lisa. Lisa, I ignore you.
And puppies, and the Brook? Nope. Neither will I breathe a word about those, too.
But your poem. Oh! Your poem is just soooooooooo Lutish!
Myra
Edited on Feb 21, 10:47 p.m. because 'to edit, - of course'.
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