Through a whisper and an open window
their sent just wafts and their voices carry.
"Don't be long", and I lie almost sleeping,
without my luscious field and strawberry.
Yet their sent wafts and their voices carry.
I breath in, sleeping on my foolish hill;
where others are now awake, my clock reads
"It's now one after nine o'nine". Mind shakes
and harmonics from my paper cup bleeds.
Here others are awake, still my clock reads.
Through my open mind all Hare Krishna,
is slipping, and still yet here comes the sun,
blind, taking grip on my helter skelter,
when happiness almost was a warm gun.
Once slipping, and then now here comes the sun.
I grin, for I've just seen a face, or four,
escaping glances out the window pane;
the man in the crowd; working over time
in his wood; drinking nautical champagne
and sending glances out the window pane.
"I know you". I smile and just hum along,
"Come together, over me" I fallow,
rest my weary feet to sleep on the bricks
below the window you can't see, "Hello".
"Come together, here and then I'll fallow".
I just need this fix, "Revolution mine!"
They come all grooving up slowly, knees bent
over their hair, brown, all my mine, me mine.
And to fix a hole, for my money's spent,
They come grooving up slowly, and backs bent.
Author notes
This not only, in an abstract way, creates an image of my addiction to The Beatles, but it also illustrates my obsession over them, using countless quotes and near quotes and images they have created.
Here is the basic poem breakdown. (as you will see I rarely do anything without a purpose):
"Through a whisper and an open window
their sent just wafts and their voices carry."
this describes how, even when i can't or don't hear their music I find it everywhere. It also illustrates hearing it from an open window, an illustration used for the surface story.
" "Don't be long", and I lie almost sleeping,
without my luscious field and strawberry.
Yet their sent wafts and their voices carry. "
I tell them not to be long, for I'll miss their music too much. I lie sleeping because they simulate and excite me. Without my ...strawberry is a reference to a Beatles song, saying without the Beatles I am left sleeping. The last line goes with the story, saying I soon will hear them, also, again, illustrating that even when I can't hear them directly I can indirectly.
" I breath in, sleeping on my foolish hill;
where others are now awake, my clock reads
"It's now one after nine o'nine". "
Among multiple Beatles allusions, this line goes with the story, I slept on the hill all others are awake, its a time of the day that everyone would be wakening up and thriving but to me, without the Beatles music, it still night and a time to sleep.
"Mind shakes
and harmonics from my paper cup bleeds. "
this part represent symptoms of withdraw.
" Here others are awake, still my clock reads. "
repetition of above lines, for sake of form and to advance the story in time.
" Through my open mind all Hare Krishna
is slipping, "
all my peacefulness is slipping without the Beatles
" and still yet here comes the sun,
blind, taking grip on my helter skelter,
when happiness almost was a warm gun.
Once slipping, and then now here comes the sun. "
Along with tons of Beatles quotes and near quotes, this says that their music is coming, gripping my addiction and pain, just in time before my thoughts and actions harm me.
" I grin, for I've just seen a face, or four, "
I have seen, or better, heard, the four Beatles coming.
" escaping glances out the window pane;
the man in the crowd; working over time
in his wood; drinking nautical champagne
and sending glances out the window pane. "
this part not only illustrates where in the story i see or hear the Beatles and where they are as people, but also signifies how I can hear Beatles music everywhere and in everything.
"I know you". I smile and just hum along, "
the music has for now helped my need and i smile in happiness and comfort.
"Come together, over me" I fallow,
rest my weary feet to sleep on the bricks
below the window you can't see, "Hello".
"Come together, here, and then I'll fallow. " "
This says a lot. It says that not only do they call me but I call them, and fallow to find their music, both in the story and in reality. I rest my body near the source of their music, and I rest my mind with them in reality, or in the window you can't see, or my imagination. The hello represent the song "Hello, goodbye," leaving out the goodbye because I don't want them to leave/to leave them. It also, in the story, represent me and the Beatles music meeting.
" I just need this fix, "Revolution mine!" "
I need them as my fix, as my revolution.
" They come all grooving up slowly, knees bent
over their hair, brown, all my mine, me mine. "
Their music comes to me, every part of them totally mine.
" And to fix a hole, for my money's spent,
They come grooving up slowly, and backs bent. "
This concludes the story with saying they have come they, as in their music, has come to save me and to fix me, back bent ready to pull me up, for all my money is spent and i can not afford a real addicting narcotic. This also illustrates how they, in real life, abstractly, saved me. With their inspiration, in booth their music and their counter culture, I was saved from a much bigger life threatening, their for more expensive, addiction (and I am not talking about a literally expensive addiction, but one that could caust me the most expensive thing of all, my life).
A contest entry
- Addicted by Velvet Rose Petals.
900 points, ended February 24, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Adding your comment: