Eyes of love
Oh sweet lover, to see you is a blessing.
For, I would die without you.
My mind tells me love, my eyes tell me you.
I am complete, for it's your beauty I see.
Come closer, for I shall show you my love, the beauty with in me.
As my lips touch yours, like molten lava we combined.
Touching your silky skin, covering me like a flower of love.
Oh, to feel your berth upon me, brings me to dreams of ecstasy.
You my love, are the only one I see.
Author notes
http://thetragictruth-of-me.deviantart.com/art/A-Distant-Figure-42014576
A contest entry
- ~Beautiful Imperfection~ by Hope Angel.
585 points, ended March 16, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prompts, Give me you everything of anything! by x-evil cupid-x.
400 points, ended June 27, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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This is beautiful thank you for entering
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This is a good poem, with solid imagery and emotion. However, there are a few things I would change:
line 3: "with out" to "without"
line 5: "for its" to "for it is"
line 6: "the beauty with in me" to "the beauty within me"
line 7: "in witch" to "in which"
line 9: "Oh to feel" to "Oh, to feel"
line 10: "You my love are" to "You, my love, are"
Like I said, the poem was very good and I liked it a lot. I found it very moving, and though short, it conjured up a lot of images and memories for me and made me smile.
)
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