I work the weekends numbered
I sleep the hours' loss
I dream the seasons lingered
within the winter's pause
I walk unfriendly sidewalks
none see the tears that fall
smiles hiding swords of sorrow
none cares to know at all
And when the gentle carer
should stop to lend an ear
I become placid bearer
and let no sharer near
Author notes
Open up. Life is too short to hide.
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Often what we want the most we fear more. For to have and lose seems to be a fate worse than never having. Often we sabotage our own lives so that we do not get what we want, therefore, not ever having the responsibility for keeping it. What form of madness is this? You once again point your pen at hidden truth and paint an accurate portrait.


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I like each quartrain, the imagery is beautiful and it speaks in tones of realisim. Beautiful write my friend.


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The first stanza is beautiful. Then the message starts to walk into the reader's mind. We must all open our hearts in our own way. Thank you for this. K.
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Deeply moving words that perhaps reflect the biting loneliness souls experience when drawing closer to The Light. Look around angel, there aren't many, but few who struggle on the same path. The many afterward will follow, to trod the soil wide and hollow. But ahead of them recons must explore to lead the way toward futures of yore. Ack.


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The flow in which
you have written the poem 'substantiates' the 'mood' and 'tone' of observation and experience. The choice of words light with depth, but straight and uncomplicated to ive an indication of such experiences. By know you know my saying: "It's not whats on top, but beneath the water ... " that counts and we need to grasp. While others often take more 'note' of themselves, and too busy doing this, they gradually loose the ability to reach out. Of course it may also be that their need override their 'deeds'. Some have never been 'taught' to reach out. But then [ Oh these 'thens] there is the 'us' at fault, who cannot open up for whatever the reason. I believe that this is also a reason for the situation that you have sketched. We can go on and on finding the reason or cause - the sad thing is that I have to take responsibility for my 'ownership'! Blessings to you. Frans

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I see the third stanza now. I do that too, who am I to think I am suffering when there is a world of worse? (I'm all right, or will be, and I am not going to let you pity me.)

I love the rhyms of carer, bearer, sharer.
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You are wise and caring.

How are you?
Doing better after that sinus bout? I truly think of you. Sometimes I cannot believe how fake this world is. And then I spin out poems like this one.
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I'm still poorly, but I have a fighting spirit. I'm impatient with the cough.
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This is the reason for the mask, the smile and the easy words, I'm ok. They don't want to know, they just ask because it's "polite". I used to disconcert people by thinking about their "How do you do?", but eventually I stopped; they don't like to know about our sniffles, not to mention the state of our hearts. It may be too close to their own pain.
Your rhyme is very good of course.


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