I know that nothing I can say will make him not want to...
The way the blade burns gives him freedom from his life...
I doubt even my lips taste as good to him
as the icy touch of metal on skin...
He rambles on to me,
telling me how incredible it feels...
My stomach becomes uneasy...
But I brace myself, and let him rant on.
He is so lost in his own addicted thoughts to realize,
every word he says leaves slits at my own wrists...
I gag... choke... I can't even say anything
as he tells me how much he still wants it...
I'm all that's in his way.
My pleas to stop his blood from dripping
are the only reason he bears no new scars...
I wonder if he needs me holding him back...
Would his life, full of grief and pain,
be better had I not halted his habit?
Why is the pleasure I give him not good enough
to fulfill his desire for bliss?
Why does he require this anguish?
Why does it appear
that he craves it
almost more
than he
craves
me...?
I'm wounded...
I'm confused...
I'm lost....
I hate this feeling...
This everlasting will to give him anything he wants,
and yet this selfish wish to take that felicity away...
I wanna be all his body yearns for..... I can't share that place in his heart
with blood and razor blades...
I wanna be better.... at helping him to not need that dark habit
he craves so much....
Author notes
Freeverse
Option 2
If you don't like it, don't comment please... I only wrote this to make my body stop throwing up... I really feel sick right now....
It's pretty obvious what this is about, but if you just feel like learning more into my depressive situation just message me...
ADDED: I did NOT write this poem to damn him to hell or anything, I love him and I wish I could help him more. He has been through more than any of you will ever know, and none of this is his fault. Please do not judge him as just another lame emo teen that needs to get over himself, because it goes far deeper than that. Thank you...
~Angel
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this is INTENSE. i know exactly how you feel, down to the quesy feeling in the pit of your stomach. you desrcibed your situation phenominally. great write. hope it helped a little. i know it's hard.
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that was sooo good im sorry he shares all that with u maybe thats his way of stopping
oh well,
if u or him wants to talk then im here
i love the format of the whole thing very well done -
I doubt even my lips taste as good to him
as the icy touch of metal on skin...
wow this is so good. I can understand exactly how you feel..but i can more so relate to the guy. Trust me it's not that you're getting in his way..its more so of the fact that cutting is his only way to cope which doesnt make it right ...but still. I hope everything is all better now.And please dont blame yourself ..! good luck! message me if you need some1 to talk to :] -
Great job
Thanks so much for putting this into my contest! -
I completely understand how you feel. My boyfriend is an ex-cutter, and I know that it's not easy to continue loving someone who seems to love that razorblade more than you. However, because we love them, we must accept that it is part of who they are, even if we don't agree with the practice.
I am a psychology-major and am studying to be a therapist; I want to work with young people who cut or otherwise harm themselves, because it breaks my heart that someone so young knows such pain and feels the need to hurt himself in such horrendous ways. Like any other addiction, cutting is dangerous, and your boyfriend needs to get help; I'm sure he will in his own time, but it can be agonizing, as someone who obviously loves him, to wait for that time to come. I know it was for me.
As for the 'emo' comment in your ANs, it sickens me that society has built an entire subculture around pain and wanting to bleed it out... Most cutters have serious psychological issues, and the fact that people so willingly mock their pain is completely dehumanizing.
My heart goes out to you, sweetie. If you ever want to talk about it, please let me know
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Wow, thank you so much for your comment.
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You're so very welcome. Sometimes, knowing you're not alone can make all the difference
Take care,
L.
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Hopefully your efforts won't be in vain, and that you'll rid him of his sickness once and for all. I could only imagine the anguish that you're feeling... and offer invisible encouragement. To say this is beautiful is highly inappropriate but you have conveyed yourself well, and I wish you all the best!
Thank you for sharing this with us, and reminding me never to give up.
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Let the silly fuck-wit slice himself. What a big girl. Way to handle your problems. Dump him and find yourself a guy with a proper pair of bollocks.
ps. Writing soppy poems is only going to encourage the retarded big girl's blouse, don't you think? -
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Lol wow... umm.... It's not that easy to break up with someone when you love them as much as I love him.
He stopped for me and I know thats hard for him, I just wish I could make it easier on him is all.
Thank you for your comment, it actually made me laugh a whole lot for some reason.
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No problem. Alternatively you could get some sea salt and rub it in is wounds next time he cuts. At the very least you can rest assured in the knowledge that his wounds are clean, thanks to you.
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I like knowing that he doesn't anymore, but its kinda the fact that he still wants to despite the fact that it would hurt me.
It's his addiction talking though, not the real him... He would never hurt me.
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A great poem indeed. It's so heartbreaking that you have to go through this but in such situations, one needs to be patient. I'm quite sure that he doesn't do it because you're not enough for him but people who so-to-speak turn to their wrists, do so because they become addicted to it; because they need it when the people they love aren't around mostly. I think you should make sure you're there for him at any time he needs and more, and also give him all the attention you can. Show him how much you care.
Going on to the poem, I really felt the desperation, anguish and pain through your verses. It's amazing. Wonderful poem! keep on writing and I wish you all the best =]
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I'm trying to be there for him... I'm just worried that I'm not enough...
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Thank you very much.
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im srry babe ..really and you taste a 1000 times better. its just when i dont see you that it wants me back.... even if you said i could i wouldnt. it hurts to see you like this.... i love you too much to ever again.
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... It's okay babe, it's not your fault and I know it...
I was just confused... But thank you for reading it, and understanding how I feel...
*Hug* I love you...
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really sad
This is a really really sad poem but so well written. Reading it i really can feel all your emotion through the words you have written here.
Holly.
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It's just my slightly poetic ramblings of everything I felt and thought about early this morning. Thank you for your comment...
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