I must have spent every
waking moment in and out of
your head
waiting for your assessment,
collapsing into abstraction
not knowing or able to assure myself
my existence is invulnerable
to your eyes.
and my thoughts burrow into my skin
leaving trails of infection.
what are you needing,
behind you I see words adrift above your
head and it shows your fears
and i can pull you apart piece by piece
and i've never been as good as you but your thoughts tell me every
thing
and we are one spiraling down
and I don't care how I feel but i'm circling down
down
and my concept of reality fades away
and i'm dreaming of some far away world,
Author notes
ugh,
first write-in bout 6 months be harsh.
be blunt i want the truth
A contest entry
- Give Me Anything! by ToxicSuicide.
700 points, ended March 22, 64 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Any Poem Welcome by jayyniecakes..
1158 points, ended February 16, 188 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Stress (prewrites welcome) by Danna Hobart.
400 points, ended February 12, 18 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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this was amazing i loved your emotion...sorry its taking so long to judge i have to go threw and read each persons poem...i'm going to announce the winner after i finish reading all of the poems....i loved your vocabulary...and i felt every word:] and good luck
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This is a good rough material. I believe there are some places that can really be patched up, but then again you might not want to because sometimes when you try to fix things it loses the real and raw emotion. So it depends on how you want to look at it, I myself prefer the raw emotion over fancy words and smooth transitions. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck!
~ToxicSuicide.
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I really like this one. Thank you for entering my contest.
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This is a great write. I have been plagued with writer's block as well so I know how hard it can be to post for the first time in months. I can definitely relate to the emotion that's described. You did a great job!
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There is strong writing here. I thought the first half of the poem was the strongest. The last half seemed a bit disjointed, almost as if it could be its own poem (and perhaps it can!
). 
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thank you!
On the last part I think I may have drifted of, almost maybe lost inspriation.
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BEAUTIFUL!!!
FINALIST!! -
Young poet
an excellent piece of writing. Perhaps calling to mind what is and is to be.
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