They lean
while we speak in the angered tones of love;
our eyes, remembering the passion
our words, the responsibilities of daylight
A final kiss, cut short, we walk away
from their dreams.
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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Intriguing
Ah....now, who are "they" we ask? Young lovers, eavesdropping on the old married couple - a glint of pity in their eyes and thoughts of "never gonna be us" lying them a lullabye? Or the children of the marriage - as the lovers shed their skins, revealing the necessary creatures of mundane family life....or the end of it? Or are "they" the past selves....watching with sorrow as their "once-upon-a-time" dreams drown in their tomorrow's realities? We don't ever need to know.....just to think and feel...all possibilities....all insights....all depths. And, its all in there...intended or not....for the discerning reader with a hungry heart.
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Hi John
If there were an "expressionist" movement in poetry,this would be in there.
Very emotional.
John
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Feels like the end of a love song or movie.
I like it when few lines bring a scene to my mind.
You have done it here
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There are times when we must keep those "angry tones" to a minimum, especially when the children are ear shy. My kids are adults now and when they share the times they heard our nasty words towards one another, they usually say how frightening it was for them. ~Sigh
We are only human and some day they will sleep restfully knowing that you two really love each other. Excellent poetry, which could be interpreted on many levels.
Good to read your muse again dear friend.
Much Love Always ♥
Renee
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I think I get it. Two lovers having spent the night in passionate screwing are now feeling post-coital tristesse and have to go to work with hangovers and perhaps some good old fashioned faith-based guilt. But there is the title “vicarious,” and “They lean” and “we walk away from their dreams,” implying an audience wishing for happy endings and Hollywood’s simplistic, sugar-plume visions of romance. If I’ve got it right, your poem is brilliant. If I have it wrong, well…shame on you.
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Certainly close. An affair ending walking away and those listening living vicariously (their dreams) through the lovers.
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