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Her Greatest Loss

 

 

 

She sits in semi-darkness in the corner of the room
the atmosphere is silent and so still,
shadows growing longer in the cold encroaching gloom
her love of life has died, she has no will.

It doesn’t seem so long ago that life was full of fun
retirement for them meant just one thing,
a long awaited cruise off to their island in the sun
where he had planned to give his wife a ring.

But Fate was on that voyage and had made another plan
their day upon the beach would never be,
his heart had caused him problems and she’s lost her perfect man
his empty shell was cast into the sea.

The cruise is just a memory as she returned alone
a little box sits open on the shelf,
a second chance at happiness, their love had truly grown
but now she’s sat in darkness by herself.

The man she gave her heart to is no longer by her side
the colours of her world a paler hue,
emotionally depleted from the tears that she has cried,
just a shadow of the woman that he knew.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author notes

Prompt.

Shadow Of A Woman.......

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 14 of 14

  • Pattiboo silver member
    August 30

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    sad but beautiful

    A lady I worked with had this very thing happen to her. She and her husband were on a cruise after he retired and he was taken ill suddenly. It proved to be cancer and he was dead within six months. She felt totally cheated of all her hopes and dreams for their retirement. Even when I knew her 10 years later it still showed when she spoke of it.


    • Sue Cardwell gold member
      August 31
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you Pat for reading some of my darker poetry, I think we can all relate to such things as we grow older and lose the ones we love.

      Sue


  • Gwenevere
    June 25

    Edit | Reply
    This is such a sad poem but it happens to someone every second of every day.How do they cope.Who knows but they do.Strength comes fro somewhere even if we don't realise it at the time.Life can be so cruel and you have portayed it so poetically here as only a true poet could.Well done, Ros


    • Sue Cardwell gold member
      June 27
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for such a lovely comment Ros ... I do wonder sometimes just where we all find the courage to carry on ... but we do

      Sue


  • Blushfulmoon silver member
    March 1

    Edit | Reply

    excellent

    I read one entry here and thought I would read one more so glad I did
    This tugged at my heart strings...the poem was penned beautiful but so sad...and the side border with her holding her hands to head got me...
    Nice to meet you as well and hope you come visit me
    Congrats on the Silver Trophy
    Susan~~~


  • LittleMoon silver member
    February 8
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful


  • csmmoms2
    February 6
    Edit | Reply

    Lovely

    And someday she'll shine again...and she'll remember when.
    -c


  • hawkeslake gold member
    February 6

    Edit | Reply
    Again I am so impressed by your ability to write a full-blown story in so few stanzas, to keep the emotion flowing through, and yet the rhyme scheme never falters, nor does it interrupt the story. A wonderful work. Sue.

  • Bad Bill
    February 6

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully written. This is one of those times when content, sentiment, metre and rhyme combine in a burst of triumph - excellent piece.

    Best wishes,
    Bill


  • arafura gold member
    February 5
    Edit | Reply
    Another gem from your gifted pen!


  • Corvus Corone
    February 5

    Edit | Reply
    When one you love passes beyond the physical veil they take half of you with them, the half left behind can only grieve and live with the emptiness.

    You shown that so delicately in this write Sis. Thank you for sharing

    Jem

  • This is the kind of write where I think you are in your element and show your full potential, though perhaps I am biased towards rhyme, especially where it is used to tell a good story which this poem does very well.


  • Amera gold member
    February 5

    Edit | Reply
    Your pen must have built is heartache because it flows from it so well. I really like what you did with the meter of this poem it enhances the emotion so very well.

    Love,
    Amera♥

  • Bob Fox
    February 5

    Edit | Reply

    My

    Deep sorrow and thw dreams gone. The cruise of fate that takes all the magic away. Poet excellent as always.

1 - 14 of 14