|P|L|E|A|S|E| baby;;
Tell me you .L.O.V.E. me
Before my heart F/\R/\A/\C/\T/\U/\R/\E/\S
I swear that's not
W
H
I
S
K
E
Y .you smell on my. B|R|E|A|T|H
I promise you I'm not;;
/.H.I.G.H.\
&& That's not
*E*
*C*
*S*
*T*
*A*
*S*
*Y* you see in my D<>I<>A<>M<>O<>N<>D
.::e.y.e.s::.
Let's just share this 'C'I'G'A'R'E'T'T'E'
&& watch crystal ,R,A,I,N,D,R,O,P,S,
.F.
.A.
.L.
.L.
We're both so [|STUBBORN|] && yet so .w.i.l.l.i.n.g.
;; to be ..crushed..
You're |N^E^V^E^R| there to catch ::me::
&& I'm ,s,o,r,r,y, I always let you
|D|
|O|
|W|
|N|
But *|B|A|B|Y|* I just can't do this .anymore.
I need to hear you .L.O.V.E. me
You're |I.R.R.E.P.L.A.C.E.A.B.L.E| love;;
&& I need only |.Y.O.U.|
please baby I'm .B/R/O/K/E/N. && so hurt
You just had to ::leave::
so now my [[CRIMSON]] ,b,l,o,o,d, will stain;;
our |'old'|
|P
H
O
T
O
G
R
A
P
H
S|...
[[.B.A.B.Y.]] I'm finally;;
.F.
.R.
.E.
.E.
Tell me you .L.O.V.E. me
Before my heart F/\R/\A/\C/\T/\U/\R/\E/\S
I swear that's not
W
H
I
S
K
E
Y .you smell on my. B|R|E|A|T|H
I promise you I'm not;;
/.H.I.G.H.\
&& That's not
*E*
*C*
*S*
*T*
*A*
*S*
*Y* you see in my D<>I<>A<>M<>O<>N<>D
.::e.y.e.s::.
Let's just share this 'C'I'G'A'R'E'T'T'E'
&& watch crystal ,R,A,I,N,D,R,O,P,S,
.F.
.A.
.L.
.L.
We're both so [|STUBBORN|] && yet so .w.i.l.l.i.n.g.
;; to be ..crushed..
You're |N^E^V^E^R| there to catch ::me::
&& I'm ,s,o,r,r,y, I always let you
|D|
|O|
|W|
|N|
But *|B|A|B|Y|* I just can't do this .anymore.
I need to hear you .L.O.V.E. me
You're |I.R.R.E.P.L.A.C.E.A.B.L.E| love;;
&& I need only |.Y.O.U.|
please baby I'm .B/R/O/K/E/N. && so hurt
You just had to ::leave::
so now my [[CRIMSON]] ,b,l,o,o,d, will stain;;
our |'old'|
|P
H
O
T
O
G
R
A
P
H
S|...
[[.B.A.B.Y.]] I'm finally;;
.F.
.R.
.E.
.E.
Author notes
Prompt-Word Bank (I used 16, hope that's ok)
Crystal
Crushed
Broken
Cigarette
Whiskey
Stain
Raindrops
Crimson
Diamond
Stubborn
High
Ecstasy
Irreplaceable
Free
Willing
Photographs
Name: xXxVelvet-TearsxXx
****DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW TO FIX THE DOWNWARD FLOWING WORDS??? I JUST CAN'T GET THEM TO FLOW RIGHT ): Thanks anyways ***
A contest entry
- Twisted Love Prompts by letters to no one.
500 points, ended September 14, 7 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - D.I.R.T.Y. [p r e t t y] ♥ ConTest ♣ by Kathraina.
490 points, ended March 20, 37 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think. I would really love some constructive criticism. Thanks
Comments
-
Wow, this is really amazing!
I'd prefer less "baby" but thats just a pet peeve of mine, no worries
Great job though, love the imagery and emotion invoked here! -
This is a very good poem, I know what you mean my downward words never seem to line up right and I cant figure out how to fix them either.... Sorry. Anyway my favorite part in your poem is
"
We're both so [|STUBBORN|] && yet so .w.i.l.l.i.n.g.
;; to be ..crushed..
You're |N^E^V^E^R| there to catch me;;
&& I'm ,s,o,r,r,y, I always let you
|D|
|O|
|W|
|N|"
Great write and good luck in the contest
!
-
-
thank-you very much, and I think that's my favourite part too (:
-


