You promised,
you'll stay,
You promised,
you'll always be here,
and I put all of my hopes on those,
never imagined that I'll be left broken.
You said,
I changed your life,
You said,
I made you a better person,
And I am forever grateful because of those,
and it didn't even cross my mind that those are all jokes,
you just love to lewd people, who cares a lot
about you...
A path seems so straight ahead of us,
but it seems the fog started to appear
the fog grows thicker until I can see no more
just the moment of blindness
did I feel your coldness within.
I was agitated with my state,
you're her and yet it feels so empty,
You're holding my hand, tightly,
but it seems you're really never here
with me.
I should've known better,
that I'll end up like this,
I should've known earlier
that everything was displaced,
You and Me would never be a good puzzle,
nor to be a good picture to see...
I should've known better,
that you'll go away,
it's a habit I know you'll never break...
Author notes
It's a story about my "friend" who promises everything that I would always hope for, and that he would never do.
A contest entry
- She was heartache from the moment that you met her. by Slinky-milinky.
1750 points, ended February 23, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Uhmmm... Uhmmmm.... Comments PLEASE!!!! :)
Comments
-
The tenses (past,present) seem a little confused within sentences in this, but at the same time it kinda works- almost as if you are thinking of what you would like to say to him, in response to lies and false promises, but cannot work up the courage to do so, like an internal monolougue.
-nice clear sense of emotion
"just the moment of blindness
did I feel your coldness within."
-very sad, its so difficult when people you depend on vanish at your greatest time of need.
thank you for entering my contest and good luck.
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