It was so long ago,
the day we met.
So long ago, it's hidden
by the frosts of time.
You've changed since then.
But then,
so have I,
in good ways and bad.
Our first day is frozen
in my memory.
When did my heart
freeze, too?
We used to play
and laugh.
But the laughter stopped
when life moved in.
Business, kids, age
brought pressures
and nothing seemed funny
anymore.
We used to touch,
soft, lingering
touches.
When did your love
grow brittle
like leaves on the ground
in January?
Life has grown so big,
swallowing us up
as it grew.
Perhaps,
if we both turn around,
we can look back and see
our first day.
A contest entry
- Stress (prewrites welcome) by Danna Hobart.
400 points, ended February 12, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
-
great write
i can really relate to the message that you are putting across ...
it gives me an understanding that not everyone stays the same, as i thought everyone would ... people change and others around them just need to cope with them and understand their views if that has changed as well
xo -
Moments
I can relate to this alot,
It doesn't rhyme, and yes, it's not an easy flow, but I can see where your coming from, and as for words, overall I enjoyed reading it.
Keep it up
(:
-
it's hard for me to relate to poetry w/o meter or rhyme. your poem does progress smoothly however. the beginning and end are supported well by the middle.
regards
-
I can really relate to this one. Just living drives a wedge between people sometimes. We grow apart. It is hard to reconnect.
Thank you for entering.
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