Golden slumber rises to the morning star
beauty bounds for the day alive,
giving gifts to amaze the naked eye.
Breath of life carries the majestic creature,
to troubled hearts in need of uplifting....
People of every nation seeing this beautiful creation
are immediately connected to the divine.
Instantly forgetting, if only for the moment,
troubles weighing heavy on their soul....
The silk binding us all together,
though appearances and sounds may be different,
still we are all the same.
Seeking that one thing we cannot touch, see or hear,
yet knowing in our heart it's in and around us.
The fabric in which love is made of
and can never be destroyed or broken,
only stretched every once in a while.
Author notes
Image and Quote Inspired
Comments Greatly Appreciated
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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I agree.
It seems so sad that the things that binds us all, often lead to misunderstanding. But if we took the time to communicate better we will find what binds us. -
omg
i told my friend the exact same words as 4;2,3 -
Excellent
What a great write. So very creative. Thank you for sharing.
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a very beautiful write from you. thought provoking and inspiriring. thank you for sharing this write with me today. i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie
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good good.
I like it, very well written. I think this is really good and very beautiful. Great write.
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I will definitely be pondering this image of the material of love for a while. Very thought provoking.
It may help you to better understand your own work to try and wrap some of those abstract images into concrete, seemingly insignificant details that allow a reader of your poem to earn images such as "troubled hearts" (cliche).
Still, the nature of the poem makes this practice quite difficult as the third stanza proves. It is relatively abstract and general, and yet it flows and is appropriate as a sort of chorus for the rest of the poem.
If you want a fun exercise that will help you reevaluate your work, just go back through and rewrite each line so that, while it still says much the same thing you said before, it is expressed in a new way. You may find some fun new imagery to add to this fine piece of work you've created.
Good stuff!
IC C
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The fabric in which love is made of
and can never be destroyed or broken,
only stretched every once in a while.
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I love this part............
this whole poem Rock
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powerful
this creates brilliant imigery, and really makes me think. It flows very well, and i like how each verse is a different length.
Keep writing,
Holly. -
Would that it were true. Beautiful writing in a way that could almost pursuade a cynic. Of course, the "stretched every once in a while" is the rub, isn't it? Like the Jew having his head cut off by a Muslim famatic. Let's pray for peace.
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this was really beautiful.. I love the word usage here, it was a soft read and yet it was just.. wow
truly something I would enjoy reading again.. Thank you very much for sharing something so wonderful..
Angel
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I think our views on the existance of god are very different, but simply looking at this poem as a piece of literature I am impressed. The language is easy to understand but gives the impression of being high brow, and your use of alliteration works extremely well in the first verse. To use the word naked in the first part, and then later on the line 'The silk binding us all together' gives the impression of someone being wrapped or clothed with love, and this is upheld with fabric metaphor in the final part. One thing I would like to point out is the line 'The fabric in which love is made of' maybe should omit the work 'in' or replace with the word with, but this is probably just a typo anyway. Very nice work.
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Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I am very pleased with your dissection and points of interest. One thing does puzzle me though on your statement of different views of God. Isn't He the same God for all just called by different names? Personally I see Him as my Lord, our God, whose name is Jesus Christ. But that's just me. I pray you have much success with your studies and excel in all you do.
In God's Love
Noah
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Absolutely loved the closing lines. They provide hope, and a bit of humor too. Lovely imagery and a good message. You are very talented. Great write!
[Liz<3] -
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Thank you for your time and comment both are greatly appreciated. You are absolutely right, love is all you need. Took a peek at your page and will venture to read your work soon. thank you again.
In God's Love
Noah
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awwww, such a beautiful piece
"The fabric in which love is made of
and can never be destroyed or broken,
only stretched every once in a while."
Perfect ending!
TY for entering and sharing this beauty
Lynda
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Thank you for your time and comment my gracious hostess and dear sweet sister.
In God's Love
Noah
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I like the theme of your poem. That love that is around us that you can't taste, touch or feel but you know it's there, the unseen power, God's love.
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Thank you my dear sweet hemeoone. You and your thoughts are greatly appreciated. It is the love of God we must all share because the love of man cannot save anyone only destroy man. How beautiful and glorious our Holy Father is and will not forsake the humblest of His Children.
In God's Love
Noah
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