She can't live without
him because she has nothing else.
Her dad is a surgeon, her mom a
beauty queen.
He can't live with himself,
the drugs and alcohol
have made him a nobody.
When they found eachother
it was jumping in a cold lake
on a hot summer day.
But their love was to be tainted
but family honor and duty.
She refuses to move away,
and cut all contact with him,
while he refuses to listen
to his buddies and let her go
so he can maintain his
role as the life of the party.
She starts to slit her wrists
and he drives recklessly down
dark and slippery roads.
Without eachother they'll die,
so they do it themselves.
She cuts too deep, and he goes too fast.
Their suicidal love has brought them to hell,
and even there they cannot be together.
Author notes
caterpillar
{http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2006/05/26/R_J_060526093848011_wideweb__300x375.jpg}
In a list
A contest entry
- Not So Happily Ever After (Romeo And Juilet) by HereComesTheSun.
950 points, ended February 13, 31 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Any Poem Welcome by jayyniecakes..
1158 points, ended February 16, 188 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - round one (for everyone) prewrite contest ENTER ENTER ENTER (AND YES THAT MEAN'S YOU too by serenity silvermoon.
927 points, ended February 16, 1509 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
soo....whats your honest opinion?
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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that pic is cute... it looks like theyre in a play.. omg and her dress is to die for x]
aww so sad... it sucks they cant be together.
best of luck in my contest ! :] -
Awww, this is so... tragic. Makes me want to be an angel to come down and recue them from their broken hearts and broken lives. So emotive and a skillful write.
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Postive: great use of periods and comas. it really helped set the pace of the poem. also really great ending and the title fits perfectly. one of those few times in poetry where the last line gives you the title and works well. great work.i also really loved the line "she cut to deep he drove to fast" it just hits the reader in the face. great work
Negative: it in the begging felt very Grease, but the ending really changed that
great work -
This is full of sadness but beautifully told 
C
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Wow.
This is really great. The imagery and flow is brilliant and the idea of an unhappy ending is very good. I know I've been that in love with someone that I wouldn't listen to people. In fact,. I think I still may be.
Good luck in the contest and congrats on the great write
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